Pondering the Mystery of it All

Who was she?  Who was this "highly favored one," the "blessed among women," woman?  What was she, this Mother of God? (Luke 1:28)

She was discussed at length for a woman of her ancient day yet, we know precious little of the one who carried the Precious Little.

We know that she was ~
       "highly favored, that the Lord was with her, that she had found favor with God, that the Spirit would come upon her and the Highest would over shadow her."  (Luke 1:28-35)

She lived in the Shadow of His great love, a mother loving a Babe, swaddling a Savior, nurturing the Nurturer.  She lived overshadowed, in His great wings.  She would make late night flights to protect the Protector, to save the Savior.

What great and awesome things, what mysterious Love had been born to this favored one.

But, what of her?  Who was she?

She was willing ~ "Lord, let it be unto me . . . " (Luke 1:38)

Willing ~ yes, certainly.  Yet, we read of another truth of this mother ~ she quietly pondered, pondered all these awesome things.

Three times over our beloved doctor tells the tale of a quiet mother who simply said, "Lord, let it be unto me . . . " and then she quietly pondered.

Luke 1:29 ~ ". . . she was troubled at his saying, and considered what manner of greeting this was."

Luke 2:19 ~ "But Mary kept all these things and pondered them in her heart."

Luke 2:51 ~ ". . . His mother kept all these things in her heart."

The Wonder of her womb ~ the Creator of the cosmos chambered inside ~ and yet all this Mystery she allowed to quietly abide.

She surely knew her ancient texts, the Psalm of David ~ and her soul silently waited for God (Psalm 62:1).  And Isaiah tells her again ~ he reminds this young woman who is carrying her God to wait upon her God.

And the wonder of this woman ~ that she quietly ponders the Wonder of us all.

She was highly favored and the Lord was with her, could it be because Savior Babe craved the one who would quietly abide?  So, He carved a crater to carry the Creator of the cosmos in the womb of the woman who would quietly wonder at the splendor of it all.

Could it be He craves the same in you?  in me?

A quiet place with a quiet people who quietly wait to hear the voice of the Lord.

So, He carves a crater in the one who quietly ponders
   and He lives inside those who quietly abide.

In a world wild with noise I hear the good doctor tell me three times over
   of this ancient Mother,
who silently held the Wonder of us all
   and quietly pondered her magnificent call  . . .  and she found favor with God.

Could it be that if we would slow to a still silence that Creator God would come again gentle as a Babe, a swaddled Babe lying in a manager?

Yet, we live loud and ponder a pitiful little, we run fast and our mouths run faster.  We ask why do we not hear Him?  Why do we not see Him?

But, we have forgotten that He came quiet, He came small, He came wrapped in dirty linens, lying in the manger for there was no room in the inn.

He did not seek the powerful, nor the rich, He had no concern for her position among her people, He only asked that she wait quietly upon Him, and she did, to meditate day and night upon the Word, and she did and she is called, "blessed among women."  This too she quietly pondered.

In an age that despises the still and the silent we would be well served to remember our ancient mother ~ the wonder of the woman who quietly held the Universe in her womb.

We might be tempted to say that if we lived as Mary, with Savior of all living inside then we too would slow and steadily ponder the Wonder of it all.  We would hide the Mystery in our heart and quietly watch the Master take master of it all and yet, we have forgotten the great Truth ~ to those who believe on the Lord Jesus Christ ~  "the Kingdom of God is within . . . "  (Luke 17:21)

The same good doctor who tells the tale of young mother and Savior Babe has told the telling tale of this mother ~ that the kingdom of God is within, within me.

Skilled surgeon has peered inside and with his spiritual eyes he tells a truth ~
    that will turn the tide,
the Savior God dwells inside,
   those who quietly abide.

So, see we have no excuse ~ He asked us to wait the same as virgin mother and to those who obey, to those who quietly ponder the Majestic Wonder He promises the favor eternity.

He quietly asks,
     "What will it be,
Facebook or Me?
     Selfish ambition that pushes a hectic pace,
or quietly abiding while you run MY race?
    It is a simple question,
that demands the deepest of reflection ~
    What will it be,
noise of self or a God-filled eternity?

She considered . . .
   She quietly pondered . . .
      She hid them in her heart . . .

The Great Mystery of us all certainly deserves that . . . and she found favor with her God.

An Answer

We hustled through the blur of lights, our cargo van bustling through a maze of Houston traffic.  We were laden heavy that night, not just with 11 weary bodies but laden with broken hearts, shattered childhoods and far more problems then we had solutions.  I wondered how we would ever safely arrive anywhere with 9 mended hearts and 9 awakened spirits; what could possibly carry all those broken pieces.  There is no vehicle capable nor Mama equipped to do the unimaginable.  The laundry list of things broken that needed to be fixed ran constantly through my mind, spinning and churning far faster then I could control ~ sometimes I want to drop off this spinning wheel of broken hearts but then who will lead them to their Father?  I stayed on motion sick, dizzy and asked for peace ~ Peace to quiet the spinning, an Answer to dim the dizzy blurring lights.

I awoke the next morning with the lingering ache in my head and dizzy spin in my mind and He patiently beckoned me with a promise to slow the spin and to dull the ache, the ache in my head and the ache buried deep within my heart.

I poured a cup of hot tea and I opened my Bible (a slight sliver of heaven to bless my day) and He whispered Peace to a spinning Mama and I felt the whirl of the hurt and the rush of the needs slow and finally cease altogether.

Matthew 21:22 ~ "And whatever things you ask in prayer, believing, you will receive."

He simply said, "List them, believe for them and wait expectantly and joyfully to receive them."

List ~ Believe ~ Receive

All the broken hearts, all the sin and painful relationships, lost innocence and sickness, ALL the problems we face in one day?  Let alone a week, a month, a year, a lifetime?  Just list them, believe for them and then receive them.  It simply cannot be that simple.

What about all the worrying and problem solving I do?  What about researching and reworking?  And then of course there is the complaining and the incessant talking I choose to do about them?  What about all of these entirely flesh driven and sinful responses I have to our problems?  What am I to do with those? 

"Crucify them."

God just cleared some serious time in my daily schedule.

In my newly found free time I cracked open my journal and began to write, to list in prayer, believing for the Answer from on high to literally show up ~ I guess the spiritual term would be His manifest presence ~ but I have to say in an entirely layman's terms way ~ the Answer just shows up!  He is standing on my doorstep with His bags in His hands and He is so excited to move in and start to fix all that the world and I have broken.  His manifest presence just walked through the front door and put his feet up on the coffee table (figure of speech since we do not own a coffee table, remember, we simplified) and He is busily picking up all the little pieces of our shattered hearts and fragmented family and building something new, a new creation.

I just simply needed to ask and then believe and then I joyfully receive.

It simply is that simple.

What are you worried about?  What is shattered in your life, in your spirit?  What has your world cracked in two?  What makes your world spin and your eyes grow dizzy with the blur and the whirl of the sickening spinning?

"And whatever things you ask for in prayer, believing, you will receive."  Matthew 21:22

Yes, it really is that simple.

You do not need another book or blog, or seminar or retreat, you do not need another coffee break with friends to lament over the plight of your life ~ you simply need to bring your problems to the Answer, believe in the Answer and then wait like a giddy child, wide eyed and bubbling over with joy at the Answer that is to come.

At this point if I was a fabulous blogger I would insert a lovely template here for you to write all of your woes on flower trimmed paper but let's be straight ~ I am not a fabulous blogger, I have no idea how to create a template laid with lovely flowers and if the truth be told (which I love to do) you do not need a template ~ you just need to list them in whatever fashion the Holy Spirit leads you to.  You may scribble them in the margins of your Bible or in your journal or maybe on a coffee stained Starbucks napkin ~ where is irrelevant, all that He asks is that we ask Him, and believe in Him and then expect Him to answer.

No more worrying, no more problem solving, no more complaining or grumbling, no more wasted coffee hours lamenting over our miserable selves - just a single minded focus on the Answer and all the problems lose their dizzying effect and the dull aches in our heads give rise to grateful minds and the sinking pit in your stomach gives way to the belly laugh of those who know ~ those who know their Answer.

As the swirling circumstances of life seem to spin harder and faster our Answer seems to be simplifying the journey day by day.  The Answer runs sound and true through our days ~ He races to us in our spinning haze and simply answers so that we may enjoy the ride.

List them ~ Believe for them ~ and then Receive

An Exercise Really

An exercise to break a block or form a habit or maybe just to lay Beauty down on paper, to see the Artist paint a picture on the canvas of my life.

Just an exercise to write from the Word ~ it may be good for the soul.

Ephesians 2:10 ~  "For we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand that we should walk in the them."

I am His workmanship ~ He crafted me and then He grafted me for His good works.

I am a creature created in Christ Jesus for anyone who is in Christ is a new creature (2 Corinthians 5:17) ~ I am a new creature, crafted and grafted for only His good works.  A new creation created for a purpose ~ His purpose.

A creation is not created for the creature, it is created for the Creator.  My hand that grips the pen that scribbles lines that form words that work language is created to show forth His good works.  This body, His temple, was not crafted and then grafted into the Vine to satisfy this flesh but to glorify Christ.

These things, these good works, were prepared before - before the body was crafted and the spirit was graciously grafted - before time began, think of that!  Before the first second tick-tocked its way through the corridors of space and time, before time even knew to begin, He thought of me and He set out good things, good works for me to walk in.  Before time began, He thought of me and you . . .

That I should walk in them . . . I feel my foot fall settle into the steps He has laid down before me.  My feet slip small into the cosmic print of my Father, for He has walked before me and these good works ~ He planned them before the first tick of the great clock that counts out the very second till His return ~ well, I am to fall in step with them, with Him.

This weary Mama finds much rest, much peace in the steps He has laid before me, good works for His purpose ~ that, I can walk out.

Nine little souls traipse heavy behind me, they too are scrambling to lay foot into His mighty print on their lives.  I watch them and I pray, pray that the Lord will bless them and keep them (Numbers 6:24) and that their young feet hit His paths of righteousness every time (Psalm 23:3).


So, the exercise of Words hitting the paper is to the spirit as feet hitting the pavement in to the body ~ strength found in the flow, strength found in the continual telling of the Word.

Lord, let me not grow weary in doing good.

Lord, let me not grow weary of running a race of your good works that You graciously crafted and grafted me to do for Your great glory.

And so . . .

Yes, that is right, we race on in the mighty footfalls He laid before the first tick and until that glorious last tock.

The Painful Publish

Obedience . . .
      
         Simplicity . . .

Unknowing . . .

Just put pen to paper, why is that so hard?

My foot fell on warm earth ~ only on God's glorious globe do sheets of ice fall there when warm rays fall here ~ only God.

I do not know what I did to deserve that warmth on that fine day ~ I guess He just knew that these achy muscles and frigid fingers needed some of His Son.

Maybe it was the warmth of our rhythmic runs that I so desperately needed ~ rhythm of foot falls and pleading questions and gentle answers ~ the warmth of the patient answers from the patient Father.

Normally I attempt to write little of self, for trust me, you do not need any of this self.  But, tonight I must confess that this self owes Someone an apology.  So, I have repented privately but He deserves it publicly.

Let me explain . . .

    Several years ago He told me how live my life, He gave me the blueprint for all my days. He said ~

Be obedient (always).

      Live simply (in everything).

And walk unknowingly (without questioning).

So, I set about it and we were obedient and our family grew from 6 to 11 and I learned a new language and I learned a new way to love.  And I was obedient.

And to support obedience we would certainly need to simplify, and we did.  I purged closets, pantries, bank accounts, schedules, commitments, relationships, my thinking and my words.

Then we stepped out into the great unknown.  We certainly knew that we knew nothing, save the love of Jesus Christ.  I knew that, I still do.

Obedience to Christ.

      Simplicity for Christ.

Unknowing in Christ. 

Those were our marching orders and we marched on.

On that early morning run He quietly asked, "You have lived your life in obedience, simplicity and unknowingly but have you written your life in the same?"

The Great Counselor asks all the right questions.

Obedience ~

Have I written faithfully, diligently and obediently simply because my Dad told me to?

No.  My track record speaks for itself (note the date of my last entry).

Simplicity ~

Do I write simply? 

No.  I am waiting to paint the Picasso with words, a language masterpiece.  What makes me think I can write a linguistic Picasso?  Good question, I have no answer.

Unknowingly ~

Have I written without knowing why I write?

No.  I have wanted to know the purpose, I have craved an answer that will not come.  I have questioned repeatedly, but dinner needs to get in the oven, why write?  I have papers to grade, what purpose do a few scribbled words serve?  I am exhausted, another day please?  I have not had a conversation with another adult go uninterrupted for more then 2 1/2 minutes in over 2 1/2 weeks, really?  You want me to write a blog that only a few read and even less care about, really? 

No.  No.  No. 

Three strikes and in a normal ball game I would be out but who ever said I serve a normal God?!

So, under the warm sun I said those all too familiar words of mine, I am so sorry, three times over, and He said, "I forgive you as far as the East is from the West."

I must admit this is not the first time I have written an apology to Him over my writing and it may not be the last, only God knows.

But, for today I wrote out of obedience, in simplicity and without knowing.

So, He teaches yet again and I march on and race on and pray on that I may write on in obedience, simplicity and unknowing.

Putting pen to paper, I have certainly missed you.

Unprofitable Servant

They were so near, just a few short weeks away, and I was already exhausted, exhausted to the core ~ bone tired and spirit weary.  And they were coming, I could hear their pain and feel their deep needs and that pain and those needy eyes were fixed on me.  That is natural, we look to Mama to heal the pain and meet the needs and I could feel the bottomless pit of pain and need.  I could hear them coming.  I wish I could say I rejoiced at the coming pain and gloried in meeting the needs of the hurting but the bone tired and the weary spirit had set in deep and wide and I felt like I might go under, under the weight of the eyes fixed on me.  It hounded me ~ the pain and the all the needs ~ hounded me.

I arose early that morning and in the stillness of the house and the quiet of the moment I fixed my eyes on the One Whom heals my pain and meets my needs and this is what He said ~

Luke 17:10 ~  "So likewise you, when you have done all those things which you were commanded, say. "We are unprofitable servants, we have only done what was our duty to do."

"My duty" and "unprofitable servant," well certainly I had not thought in those terms.  I had thought in terms of sacrifice and exhaustion, I had thought in terms of well ~ me.  But, the One Who meets my needs reminded me that all my needs had been met once and for all on Calvary and this life I live in only my duty, my response to His love.  And exhaustion and sacrifice?  Well, those are words I do not rightly understand, not set at the mark of the cross.  No, I do not understand and I am but and an unprofitable servant who simply goes about what is only my duty.

Yet, this unprofitable servant certainly does know words such as these ~ pride, selfishness and self serving and this servant knows her heart well enough to say that I am incapable of this duty I have been called to, especially with a humble and contrite heart.

Certainly you know Lord, that I cannot live out this duty day by day, hour by hour, and into the dark minute by minute and then say, "I am yet an unprofitable servant."  No Jesus, I am not just unprofitable but incapable.

And this is what He said ~

2 Timothy 1:9 ~  "God saved us and called us to be a holy calling, not because of our works but because of His own purpose and grace, which He gave us in Christ Jesus before the ages began."

Before the ages began He foreordained the grace ~ the so desperately needed grace to meet the needs and weep the tears of searing pain and to meet their fixed gazes again and again with love and mercy and then to say, "I have yet done my duty, I am but an unprofitable servant."  Yes, the grace is here to do just that and the grace will be there in the next moment and the moments full of grace will carry this unprofitable servant into the inner court of her Master, the Only Profitable One.

And as the plane touched down and the wheels stopped the spin ~ the grace landed the instant before.  Yes, it was promised ~ grace ~ before the ages began He saw this home and their pain and my inability and their needs and my exhaustion and He says, "My grace is sufficient for you and while you are yet an unprofitable servant, I love you still."

Yes, they are here and the grace is where?  Well, it is here and will be there in the next moment it is needed.

And well, how is this unprofitable servant?  Living and breathing grace that was set down before the foundations were laid, before the ages began.

We live in the promise of the cross and we race in the mercies and the grace of today, nothing more and certainly nothing less.

The race I run is merely my duty, my response to His love, His sacrifice and I look to the day when this servant has completed all her duties and lays in eternal rest in her Master's arms.

The Call of God Does What Man Can Not!

John 11:43 ~ 
   ". . . with a loud voice, Lazarus come out!"

The Word declared a loud word and called the dead man forth and the dead man walking was dead no more.  But, first . . .

She wept, this Mary, she wept for her lost brother.  And fell at His feet, "Lord, if only You had been here . . ." if only . . . but alas it appeared He had delayed and death had prevailed.  It appeared that Her Lord was too late . . . and she wept. (vs 32)

And so did her Lord, "Jesus, wept." (vs 35)

Jesus wept.  Spirit groaned.  Sighing Spirit.

He loved her, this one, He loved her and her broken alabaster jar.  The one who had washed His feet now lay crumpled, sobbing at His feet.

And Jesus wept.  And He groaned.

Death had been victorious, darkness had fallen or so it appeared . . .

And did He weep at their sorrow or maybe at their unbelief? (vs 11-15,23-25)

"Remove the stone."

"but my Lord, the stench, for he sleeps the dead man's rest for four days, too offensive the stench . . . " Martha cries.  Martha, always practical, the sensible sister.

"Did I not tell you that if you would believe you would see the glory of God!"  (vs40)

Have I not told you?  You just must believe.

And stone is rolled back and we see the death, we see the darkness, if only He had not delayed . . .

Yet even after His supposed delay, He cries out in this way ~
               "Lazarus, come forth!"

And the dead man came walking and dead man was dead no more!

"Loose him, and let him go." (vs 44)  Let him go free.

And he was free, free indeed.

"Our ancient stories, memories of the past, they came and went entirely too fast!"  some would say.

Ancient stories gone away?  . . . or Truth that brings freedom this very day?!

For I hear it, I hear Him say,
    "in death, you will no longer lay!
  Rise out of darkness this very day!"

He cries out in a loud voice, "Come out of darkness, come out of death!  Arise, you sleeper souls, arise!  Loose them, loose them, I say!"

Loose them from what? 
    Well certainly, burial clothes have bondaged them up.

Burial clothes today?  No, I am wrapped in the Gap this day.

Burial clothes of our day would more rightly be displayed this way ~
      greed, materialism, lust, gluttony, drunk on wine rather then the Vine, pornography, did I mention greed?  Well, you know the drill, we are always certain it is a "need." And the laundry list of addictions, sin, iniquity and burial clothes that wrap our very days in darkness is far too long to write.

But burial clothes?  Yes, indeed.

But, Jesus wept and then He called him out of death.

He wept and He called.  And He weeps and He calls.

And Jesus cries forth in a loud voice today, He calls you forth out of darkness and death and, "loose them!"  He says.

We sleeper souls here the cry
   and burial clothes we leave them to lie,
For we heard His gentle sigh,
  followed by His mighty cry,
"Come forth, that your soul may never die!"

What burial clothes bind you?  What has you bound hand and foot?  (vs 44)

He is the same yesterday and today and He called dead man forth that day and He cries out to you this day.

Come forth.  Run forth.  Race forth.  Come forth.

The Wordless Word

Romans 8:26 ~ "For we do not know how to pray as we should; but the Spirit Himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words."

Ancient words bore out of a timeless Being, a timeless Existence; He Who groans for me in the wordless depths.

The deep calls unto the deep . . .                                           (Psalm 42:5)

And the kingdom of God within . . .                                     (Luke 17:21)

Within every believer lies the kingdom of God and the Spirit of God quickens the dead man walking and then spirit man begins to hear . . .

the depths within hear a call from on high and the call comes from the wordless depths.  Groanings from the depths of eternity; void of time, void of words.  And the intercession of the Spirit Himself can not be qualified in quantitative limits, it can not be contained in time, nor words.  He groans for His people far too deep to measure and the Deep calls unto your depths . . . beyond the words, beyond the noise, beyond all that we know and all that we can perceive . . . the Deep is calling us home.

And we worry of work and wealth and we whittle our days away in mindless chatter and ungodly worry.

And how do we not see these ancient words ~ the Spirit Himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words!

How do we waste our days and carry about in thoughtless ways rather then plunge head first into the depths of these wordless groanings?

Do we not know?  Do we not care?

Or have we allowed the world and the enemy of our souls to so fill our lives with incessant noise that the quiet call from the wordless depths gets lost in the hustle and the bustle of life?

But, what if?  What if we dive headfirst?  What if we take the plunge?  And daily, hourly live bathed in the Spirit's intercessional groans?  What if we live our days swimming in the wordless depths?  What if?

What would be and who could we be?  And what life could we not touch?

Could we?  Can we?  Will we?

Turn off the noise and take the plunge.

Lord, let it be unto me as Your wordless word says!

I want to race my days and all my ways in Your wordless depths!  Lord, let it be unto me!

Six Words That Would Change the World Forever!!

Another week passes but the words do not flow.  I am waiting.  Waiting.  Waiting for emails from far away lands, waiting on the right van, waiting on break through in young hearts, waiting for words and waiting for bedtime.  But, most of all I am waiting on God ~ waiting on God to hit send on those emails from far away lands, waiting on God to drive our van into our drive, waiting on God to break through and to break into two those young hearts and replace them with a heart entirely new, waiting for His words and resting in His arms as the minutes tick towards sleep.  Waiting on God.

I would rather wait on God for a hundred years a thousand times over, then to take an answer from another.

My will is surrendered unto OBEDIENCE.
    My life is lived as SIMPLICITY.
And I am entirely UNKNOWING, save for the love of Christ.

He has told me to be still, so I wait in obedience.  I do not know, so in simplicity, I wait.  When the answers, the relief will come?  I do not know.  So, I wait, unknowingly.

It is a race of waiting ~ I race out of obedience, I run light and simply, and I race unknowingly (except for the Victor, I do know Him).

And those many years ago, that young woman, a child really, said, "Lord, let it be unto me according to Your word."  (Luke 1:26-38)

And in complete obedience and spoken out of simple love and without a shred of knowing, she said, "Lord, let it be unto me!"  And she did not know, how could she see . . .

that precious child hidden inside would cause a night time flight but yet she said, "Lord, let it be unto me!"

and she did not know that burdened with miraculous life inside,
  that donkey she would be forced to ride,
and Savior baby she would need to hide.

"Lord, let it be unto me!"

And the years would pass, but for this mother they would pass to fast and far too few and she would watch her Son suffer and she would watch her Son KNOWINGLY die and in an instant she would lose a Son yet gain a Savior.

Six words that would change the world forever ~ "Lord, let it be unto me!"

What is He asking you that you need to say too ~ "Lord, let it be unto me!"

Of Running and Riding and Resting and Striving (Part 2)

"For love in action is a harsh and dreadful thing compared with love in dreams.  Love in dreams is greedy for immediate action, rapidly performed and in the sight of all . . .  But action love is labour and and fortitude . . . "
                                                            ~ Fyodor Dostoevsky, The Brothers of Karamazov

When this action love, this pure love bore out in labour and carried on through fortitude; when this love wells up from our innermost man, when our innermost river flows love from on high then our running is a riding and our striving is a really a resting, a deep resting in the presence of God.

For certainly as we ride as broken bride we are called to put foot to pedal to carry more of the broken bride to meet their heavenly Guide.

It is a mystery I can not rightly fathom but I surely know it to be true that our resting and our waiting upon the Lord gives rise to a powerful striving and the swiftest of running as mighty rivers flow forth with life from His people who wait upon Him.  (John 7:38)

And as we continual ride as His broken bride we also run in His mighty stride.  We are called to ride and we are called to run and the reality of this truth can only be found in the deep abiding presence of Christ and only in that mysterious place, that awesome space, can you run and ride and rest and strive.

For an action love, love of labour and love of fortitude is not a love you and I naturally now for our hearts are deceitful and above all things desperately wicked (Jeremiah 17:9) so in our resting and our striving this is what we pray ~ "And may the Lord make you (me) increase and abound in love to one another and to all . . . " (1 Thessalonians 3:12).

And in this house and in my heart I surely know and live and breath this truth ~ " . . . for you yourselves are taught by God to love one another." (1 Thessalonians 4:9) for I did not know this pure love, this labour love until I quit my selfish striving and entered into a heavenly resting in the arms of Love.

Please do not misunderstand ~ this action love is birthed out of the heavens and spills over the edge onto to those who are quietly waiting on Him.  This is not a human striving or matter of self control.  In a Christian culture bloated on self help thinking and "we can do it" attitude, we have completely forsaken our first Love (or maybe never knew Him to begin with).  We have turned from a life lived in broken surrender before the Lord and instead are stuffed with all the best that 21st century has to offer.  We take the perfect moment caught on state of the art filming equipment, set to an inspirational sound track, with the perfect lighting and astounding audio and visual effects, played in our stadium seating churches with the optimal temperature setting to please our every whim and the correct density of cushioning under our ever growing self cushioning and a slight tear slides down our cheek and we call it a "Move of the Spirit!"  How about we call it the truth ~ HYPE.  The Holy Spirit is not hype, never has been nor will He ever be, He is ALWAYS about the same purpose ~ to glorify Jesus Christ.  And I have a funny feeling that He is none to concerned about the visual effects, temperature setting in the room or even our superficial concerns.

Listen ~ Facebook hype will not produce action love, love that will stand the test of eternal time.  Nothing will produce this pure love except for a waiting and resting upon the Lord.  The human heart can not produce this well spring of life ~ the Word rightly calls our hearts "a heart of stone" (Ezekiel 36:26) and He graciously takes this rocky heart and replaces it with a heart of flesh.  I do not care how far we have progressed in the 21st century, no one but my heavenly Father above can create in me a clean heart, a real heart.  So, I wait upon the Creator of heaven and earth.  No hype, no feel good, hug-a-bear message.  As we wait upon Him hype gives way to holiness and temporal love gives way to eternal love.

Isaiah 30:15,18
     " . . . In returning and rest you shall be saved; in quietness and confidence shall be your strength . . . Blessed are all those who wait for Him."

Our resting is our salvation and our quietly waiting is our strength to ride and run in this call to action love.

For the believer who rests in the presence of God their labour in Love is their resting in Love.

And they ride and they run and they rest and they strive from the well spring of life that flows from their inner most being.

No hype, just waiting.  No tricks, just Truth.

Of Running and Riding and Resting and Striving (Part 1)

(Please watch . . .)




                                                     
       


I watched him pedaling her through the streets and then I could not stop thinking of him.  I prayed for him and wept for him and then prayed again.  One of those few true souls who will bring a smile to your face and a simultaneous tear to your eye ~ pain and joy intermingling with one another, coexisting as one ~ searing pain giving rise to her sister, abiding joy.

And somehow in that 3:23 minute I had fallen in love.

Love lived out in purity is a rare sight indeed ~ hands calloused with time and toil, layered with love and loyalty.  Calloused hands that gently care for his broken bride. 

"For love in action is a harsh and dreadful thing compared with love in dreams.  Love in dreams is greedy for immediate action, rapidly performed and in the sight of all . . . But action love is labour and fortitude . . ."

                                                   ~ Fyodor Dostoevsky,  The Brothers of Karamazov

This call to love, this action love is certainly arduous duty.

Action love is surely dreadful and harsh indeed ~ to minute by minute lay calloused hands about a work for a broken bride who has forgotten her goodly groom.  Arduous duty indeed.

Yet another tear slides down my cheek and He silently asks me a question ~ "Why had this pure soul so gripped your soul?"

I do not know.

"This goodly groom who places a lovely crown upon his broken bride ~ this broken bride who does not rightly know that she wears a crown of His royalty.  She can not know, she can not understand, she can not remember as her goodly groom pedals hard and bears the weight of His unknowing bride.  And Godly Groom carries the weight of the world on His broad shoulders and He smiles a smile of pure love for His broken bride and a single tear of pure joy carried on the waters of His pure pain slides down His glorious cheek.  And His unsuspecting bride rides broken, shattered; shattered into pieces that will be made whole by her Godly Groom as He pedals her through the streets.

And in triumphant procession He carries His broken bride made whole by pure love, He carries her ~ His royal bride.  He carries her proudly, victoriously, gently, joyfully and lovingly.

My broken bride, does this not sound familiar to you?"  He silently asks.

Oh yes, of course, now I see ~ this goodly groom and his broken bride ~ this is surely You and me.

And You gently set me before You and lay crown upon my head and You proudly pedal Your broken bride who too, so often forgets her Godly Groom Who bears her weight upon His endless shoulders.  And we ride ~ broken bride and Heavenly Guide ~ we ride.

Run a race today?  Yes, certainly, but maybe my running is rightly named riding and all of my striving is more of a resting as my Godly Groom pedals His broken bride down streets of gold.

So, I ride on.  Who bears the weight of your world?                                                                                                                                                                                           

I suppose . . .

John 21:25 ~ "Jesus did many other things as well.  If every one of them were written down, I suppose that even the whole world would not have room for the books that would be written."

John ~ the disciple whom Jesus loved.

What would it be?  Could you imagine?  To lay upon His chest, to feel the rhythmic beat of the heart of God.  To feel the flesh that encases the Word that spoke the expanse into existence.  To lay ear to the literal heart of God.  What would that be?

I can not imagine.

But, this one whom was so greatly loved, he did just that.  John, the beloved one ~

     he laid his weary head upon His chest,
      he lounged upon Jesus' breast,
     for he rightly knew his own deep need for rest.

And he was the one whom Jesus much loved for he knew where to secure his eternal rest and as weary child this grown man laid a tired head upon this chest.  And Jesus felt much love for this weary child hiding in the hulk and the bulk of that man skin that regardless of size still aches and quakes for his Father.

So, tired child laid weary head and took no thought or concern for what was being said. 

And he was much loved, much loved.

And the one that laid human ear to heavenly heart, what did he hear?

I suppose . . .
  the wonderful tales are too many to every be told,
     and the magnificent stories this world could never hold,
 
And now, I too suppose . . .
  that His tales will surely be told,
     as His majesty unfolds,
  and maybe this world can not hold,
     but surely the heavens have told,
  for His glory makes them so bold . . .

And the books of His tales will line the shelves of His heaven and maybe one day the beloved will walk with me and talk with me and tell me, "of the time when Jesus . . . and then that book over there, well that is . . . and this is one of my favorites . . . and oh, over there . . . "

And I suppose . . .
   
     becomes what I know . . .

       and I race home towards that which I know.


(John 21 and John 13)

Just This One Thing . . .

Just this One thing I have desired, just One.  That singular thing which I seek ~

  That all my days I may dwell in the house of the Lord, to behold and to know the beauty of the Lord, and     that all my inquiries are presented in Your temple.

Forgive me for the times I have desired another.

Just this One thing ~ all the days of my life.  But . . .

Can I dwell in the house of the Lord as I sojourn in a lost and dying land?

Can I behold His beauty when the ugly truth of sin and separation from God surrounds me and sometimes I think I may even succumb.

All my days spent in His temple when we live amidst the lost and the hurting?  My existence existing in Him when sin still so easily ensnares me?

I have wondered, I have sought answers to these questions and He has answered.  All my wandering days spent in His temple?  Trodden on earthly feet amongst His dwelling?

Yes, surely ~ for I know His Truth that the kingdom of God is within, within this soul still so easily ensnared.  The temple within in this grimy, broken earthen vessel.

Luke 17:21 ~ " . . . For behold, the kingdom of God is within you." 

The Pharisees had questioned Him yet again, another earthly trap and Jesus replies with a heavenly answer . . . "the kingdom of God is within you."  And that changes everything, His words always change everything.  Every situation, every encounter, every relationship, absolutely, positively everything!  Everything is changed once we hear this Truth, once we become this living, breathing reality of His words.  Terrifyingly awesome!  The kingdom of God is within me, astonishing, simply astonishing.  That every adopted brother and sister in Christ, every forgiven and redeemed and prior orphan has an astonishing Truth that he bears witness to on this spinning globe.  The kingdom of God is within!  And all the power, and all the majesty, and all the glory, and all the encouragement, and all the wisdom and all that He is, the Alpha and the Omega, the Great and Morning Star ~ He abides within . . . me and within you if you know Him as Lord and Savior.  And everything changes and just this One thing that I have desired ~

Psalm 27:4 ~ "One thing I have desired of the Lord, that will I seek;
                         That I may dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life,
                           To behold the beauty of the Lord, and to inquire in His temple."

Certainly now this One desire becomes all the more probable and certainly promised in light of our Savior's words ~ I am within you. 

So then, what keeps us from this constant dwelling in His house?

All the other desires.

The desire for success and stability, for relationships that satisfy self, deep desires of greed (which the Word rightly calls idolatry ~ Colossians 3:5 and Ephesians 5:5), the longing for more and the climb up the rungs of this selfish ladder, the need to self promote and the drive to others ~ demote, the desires for more family or less family, the cravings of worldly beauty to obtain and then possess and then consume this counterfeit beauty.  All the desires of self ~ to be known, to be understood, heard, seen appreciated, valued and taken care of and the list goes on and on.  And they sound all too familiar to me and the list flows off finger tips like running water for I have known them all.

And yet, the only One desire we can pursue is NOT desire of self but desire for the One Who created that self.

And as the desires save that One, clear away a light dawns bright and beauty we do behold ~ a beauty past the pain, a beauty through the pain, and a beauty in the pain.

Only this One thing will do ~ to be in His presence today and forevermore.

Races are run and lost by the burden of unnecessary weight ~ burdens of selfish desire run us ragged and run us down and run us low to a depth of darkness no man should go.

Runners who run in Spirit and in Truth run lite with a singular focus ~ the One true desire to run into His presence and to run continually in His presence.

Well my dear runner ~ I must ask, what desires of duplicity do you run with today?

Heavenly Father, let each foot fall burn with but One desire ~ to race our days away in Your house and to behold the One True Beauty.

Let it be Lord, let it be.

Flooding of a Different Sort

I wrote of flash flooding and waters that rise all too quick and then I hit publish. 

Several hours later He wrote His truth on His pages and He shared a few things with me about these flood waters that we so often find ourselves swimming in.  I smiled the smile of a little girl who knows her Dad sees ~ He sees her sopping wet clothes and disheveled hair, He did not miss one slight gasp for air ~ her Dad sees and He hears.

Here is what my Dad says about flash flooding ~

Psalm 77:16 ~ "The waters saw You, O God; the waters saw You, they were afraid; the depths also trembled . . . "

The tidal wave of anger that crashes on the shores of my family, this torrent of waters that streams screaming mad into our home ~ these waters ~ they fear my Dad, they tremble at His name.  These flash floods fear my God.  So, they burst in with rage and violence for surely they know their days, their hours, their very minutes are numbered and they tremble at the knowledge of my Father. 

These raging storms of life all know truth ~ their day of reckoning is at hand and the verdict has already been delivered.

So, they stomp and storm about and rage as a toddler tantrums.  They search for the weak and the weary, they search for the unprotected, and they whip and they whirl and they spin about and in a dazed confusion the lost are dragged down in a whirlwind into the drain of the dark.  But, these dark waters are afraid, they certainly tremble and when lost soul reaches wind whipped hand He grabs a hold and in the depths of darkness the shudder runs wildly deep at the sight of the scarred hand.

The waters see and the waters tremble at my great God.

And another thing which was certainly not as easy to accept as the other ~

Psalm 77: 19-20 ~ "Your way was in the sea, Your path in the great waters.  And Your footsteps were not known.  You led Your people like a flock . . . "

This way into the great waters?  Amidst the flashing floods?  He led me here, this is His way, His path.  Into the great waters, He leads.  His footsteps are not known, for how could we ever perceive that into the great waters He would lead?  But, lead He does and He walks his people into this great sea.

Why would a good God lead His flock into the rising flood waters?  Two reasons ~

~ When flood flashes and the waters whip biting cold then His flock set hinds feet on solid ground amidst the high places and every doubt is eternally erased from their minds ~ all praise, glory and honor is due to their Heavenly Father.

~ The multitude of clenched fists still thrash and flail about, from the shore, we can not reach to haul them out.


The course is set and the path is marked ~ He will lead this race through many great waters.  We can not say that we did not know ~ will you race on?

Flash Floods

We live here in this home with these children and we live here under the threat of flash flooding.  The constant threat of a flash flood.  The flooding flows through this home so rapidly that waters have us gaping and grasping for air before we even know what has descended upon us.  The waters whip wild and the torrent of waves is quite literally breath-taking.  And some moments I think I might possibly drown under the weight of the waters of her flash and gush of flooding.

She breaks loose suddenly and the sunny day turns dark and the flood flashes and the torrent of anger and the harsh words flow faster then we can reason.  The dam breaks loose inside for some unforeseen reason and we begin to clamor to keep heads above water.

I know her history, some of it.  I know why she cracks but in the face of rage and wrath we fight hard to push back the darkness that threatens to swallow her whole.

The world has been cold to these young souls and only the hand of God can thaw the stone ice that rises up within them.  The cold of the stone ice is biting and bitter and we pray and believe that the fire of the Spirit will warm their souls.

As the flood flashes this is the Truth we cling to ~ the Rock, our firm Foundation.

When the waters gush in we cling tightly to our ~ "God, my Rock, in Whom I take refuge, my shield and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold, my Savior, Thou savest me from violence."  (2 Samuel 22:3)

We throw arms around the Rock and we reach back into the waters of rage and violence and we grab their arms as they flail and thrash about in the dark waters that tear at their souls and cling to their bodies to drag them under.  We grab a tight hold of a wrist at the base of the tight fist that clenches in loss and anger, the fist that pounds the water out fear and confusion.  And with much prayer and fasting, and the washing of the Word we slowly straighten slender fingers and unwind the wound fist and we lay their open palms upon the Rock so they too can feel the firm Foundation.  And they do feel, they feel the Rock ~ the Rock of our ages and the ages past and the ages to come.  They feel His strength and the torrent begins to subside and I feel a sliver of light warm my soul, a slice of grace lays across her face and I know they have begun to find firm ground again. 

And for now the flood does not flash, for now they stand on solid ground but I know I will hear the crash of angry waves again, they will gush wild and angry and that is alright. No, that is far better then alright for when mighty waters threaten to capsize us all then I know that sad and hurting hearts are preparing to lay open palm upon the solid Rock.  And that is the intent, that is the purpose, that is why we do what we do; that clenched fists will grasp the scarred hand and eternities will be eternally changed.

I am learning to live peacefully and contentedly amidst this flooding for not so long ago in my not so distant past I was the flash flood and His people threw my a lifeline and dragged my rebelliously clenched fist onto solid Rock.  And the winds begin to calm and the waters slip into a steady, slow rhythm and the Son shines radiant upon my face and I look back into the angry crashing waves of our lost land and look for another clenched fist that is crying out for a firm foundation to rest their wearied soul upon.

We have one purpose to fulfill as we labor and journey upon this lost land ~ to glorify our Lord and Savior and the Scriptures promise that as we glorify the one, true Savior then He will draw all men to Him.  And clenched fists open to hearts laid bare and the lost and drowning find rest for their weary souls upon the Rock; the Rock that spans the ages, the Rock that created the ages, the Rock that is the ages.

With flash flood warnings blaring in our ears and rattling in our heads we race towards six more fists clenched tightly but we gladly race on knowing we race upon the Rock. 

And the Jordan Flows On and the Jordan Flows Out

This reformed dead sea is teeming with life and I give God all glory and praise that He rejoices in bringing the dead back to life.

We live in a society that is repulsed by weakness, and we are a people that finds any discomfort detestable.  We are certain that with that particular degree from the correct university then we will be able to stave off loss and discomfort.  When the proper bank accountants reach a certain number then we will ensure our stability.  With the right dietary regime combined with cardiovascular exercise and a touch of strength training we are assured that we will become quite invisible.  We search high and low and we find the one that is certainly as anti-weakness us ourselves and we couple ourselves with them and we console ourselves that our little darlings will hit the genetic jackpot and they too will live a life of comfort and ease.

At the first sign of the sniffles we hit WebMD eighteen times, spend a small fortune at our local pharmacy, call in sick and just for good measure we visit our favorite MD who prescribes enough medication to care for a small village.  We hate sickness, we run arms wildly failing about with fright riddled all over our faces from any sign of infirmity.  We hate weakness because weakness may lead to pain and that is just simply unbearable.

A confession ~ I spent that vast majority of my life training hard to outrun any and all weakness.

Another confession ~ I was my absolute weakest at the pinnacle of what the world deems to be strong.

I pursued the correct degrees and the numbers were adding up in all the right bank accounts.  My children were walking poster boards for the Gap and all their cronies.  We lived in the right amount of square footage and my husband had the type of collar device that made others pop a smart salute.  I ran a fast mile split and swam miles in the open water and you would certainly never see me cry.  And the foolish eyes of this land looked upon me and mine and congratulated us on our assault against weakness.  I too was fooled into believing the lie that became my reality ~ that weakness was a thing to be despised.

And in heavy pursuit of the world's strength I was in spiritual decay and I may have stayed that way ~ except for the true reality ~ that Truth has a way of setting you free, free from the confines of the foolish ways of this world.

Does weakness scare you?     Yes, it did me too.  Are you frightened by infirmities and loss?  You would barely be human if you had not lost sleep over those.  Persecution?  Reproaches?  Unmet needs?  Yes, it is our fleshy nature to turn from them all and it is our cultural norm to avoid them all at all costs.  But, what if the cost is your soul?  What if it is the souls of those you love? 

Listen to what the Word says about weakness ~

2 Corinthians 12:9-10  ~  " . . . My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness.  Therefore most gladly I will rather boast in my infirmities (weaknesses), that the power of Christ may rest upon me.  Therefore I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in needs, in persecutions, in distresses, for Christ's sake.  For when I am weak, then I am strong."

In the Amplified version verse 9 reads as such ~

"But He said to me, My grace is enough for you; for My strength and power are made perfect and show themselves most effective in your weakness.  Therefore, I will all the more gladly glory in my weaknesses and infirmities, that the strength and power of Christ may rest (yes, may pitch a tent over and dwell) upon me!"

(I was writing last Thursday evening and at this point the direction of the Jordan flow changed course as a hurting child needed her Mom to talk and not write, but the waters continued to flow and provide grace and healing to us both.)

Our fear of weakness is entirely unbiblical. 

His strength is made perfect in our weakness ~ does this imply that God was not perfect before our weakness?  Of course not, for we know He is the same yesterday, today and tomorrow and He was perfect yesterday and He is perfect today and tomorrow and He is perfect with or without my weaknesses.  The perfection comes in us ~ we are the imperfect souls and as we lay weaknesses bare for the Perfect One His strength begins to wrought perfection in us.  In our frailty and failings He perfects His work of perfection in us and through us.  Think of the freedom and the rejoicing this ought to bring about in our souls!  Heavenly Father ~ gives us eyes to see and ears to hear.

In the Amplified verse 9 stopped me midstride ~ He pitches a tent over me (and my home and family!) and His strength and power dwell among us when we glory in our weaknesses!  My Heavenly Father sets up a canopy of His power over me and my home and my family if I will willingly glory in my frailty and inability!  What freedom and release this brings to me, what joy and peace I hear in these words; for lately I am nothing but frailty, weaknesses, inabilities, and one GIANT shortcoming!  For I know everyday that I have truly met my match here in this call He has called me to, I am outnumbered and overwhelmed and I awake exhausted and I am entirely UNDONE!  And God quietly and simply placed a tent of His power over this failing that is me and my failings are called perfection through power of God! 

If the call God has laid on your life does not drive you to your knees in utter desperation, if you do not wonder on a constant, hourly basis how it will be possible, if you do look at your capabilities laid beside the task at hand and weep a silent tear at the tremendous disparity between the two then dare I say you have not found His call in your life or have not surrendered to it in its entirety.  Why?  Because every believer who calls on the name of Lord and Savior Jesus Christ needs live and work and tarry our days under a canopy of His power.  Only in our brokenness are we made whole.

And today I run a race I intend to fail for in my failings I begin to race towards His perfection ~

For when my failings, I truly face
  And my weaknesses I joyfully embrace,
Then I fall in stride with His pace,
  Knowing that my Champion has already won this race.

And we race weak and we race frail and we race on for the glory of the Risen Son!

The Jordan Flow

That river doth surely flow, mighty waters wash into the Sea of Galilee and that river, that Jordan River doth flow again and the life waters flow out and on and then they crash into another sea, this sea so entirely different from the Sea of Galilee.

Water flows in and water flows out ~ the cycle of life ~ breathe life air in and breathe another life's air out ~ that is the mysterious mathematics of our Heavenly Father ~ life must flow in and then life must flow out ~ if not then we will certainly rename you the Dead Sea. 

The Galileen Sea teams with the luster of life ~ water flows in and water flows out ~ so unlike that other, that sea to the South.  Yet, we reason, the same waters flow through the banks of the Jordan into the Galileen and then into the Sea of the Dead, how can that be?  One life giving sea? and the other ~ the Dead Sea?

One flows in and then flows on ~ life poured into vast body and then flows out to pour into another ~ and that vast body is alive and well and offers sustenance to an untold number.  However, its Southernly brother, offers life to no other.  Waters pour in and never flow out ~ life floods in in tumults and then?  Death.  For this Dead Sea held the life giving waters and kept it all as its own and the waters never flowed on and on and on in the way that our Heavenly Father in His Heavenly Home intended.

Life must flow in and then life must flow out.

I stood on Ethiopian soil and worshiped with the Brethren.  I stood far from home and far from the waters that flow that I surely know and yet the waters of Life flowed and I did know, I knew those waters that flowed Life into my weary soul.  That day on Ethiopian soil he spoke to his people, his flock, I listened intently certain He has something to say through this shepherd.

He spoke of Dead Seas and the flow of waters that brings life in and then carries life out ~ I saw immediately that we the church of the West are so often that Dead Sea.  So much life flows in and we damn in up and we stand on the shore of our ever growing dead sea and we say this, this is all for me!  And the Heavenly Host turns eye towards this dead sea and they murmur that we still do not see, that with no outflow we have only a dead sea.

Everyday over a million tons of water evaporates from the Dead Sea ~ everyday tons upon tons upon tons of life giving water slips up as lost vapor.  And here we see the same ~ precious life wasted up into the vapors above this dead sea.

Why does the Dead Sea breed death instead of life?  Too much salt.  Too much minerals.  Too much.  And the waters flow in but they never flow out and the waters grow stagnate and death covers all and the life giving water vapors slip up into the heavens as millions lie dying of thirst all around.

Too much with no outflow breeds death.

In our lives here in the American church there is tremendous inflow and in our individual lives the inflow is immense as well.  What is your measure of outflow in comparison to the inflow?  Do unto others as you would have done unto you.  Love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul and mind and love others as yourself.  We must measure our outflow against this commandment from our Savior.

Several weeks later I ran under a hot sun on the soil I call home while I journey home and I asked God why He was silent.  He asked me why I had stopped the flow of living waters out of me?  I knew in my spirit where the dam had been built and why He was silent.  The dam did not stand in our finances or relationships or anything of that sort.  No, it was nothing that easy.  I had stopped the flow of waters through the written word, I had silenced my words and in this fashion Life no longer flowed out of me.  I had become a dead sea.  Simply a dead sea.

Shortly there after I stood beside more waters and he asked me, "Why are you not writing?  You know you are suppose to."  In true poetic fashion I replied, "Because I do not want to! I feel like that obscure band that continues to pound out melodies in their hot, stinky garage and they labor over lyrics that no one cares about.  I am that band and the garage is miserably hot and quite lonely and I want out of the garage because no one cares about the songs I write."

And then in true head of household fashion, he said, "So, it is not about what you want, it is about obedience.  And you are right, no one cares about your weird songs pouring out of the garage except for the only One that matters.  It is about obedience."

Darn him when he is right!  It is not about what I want it is about obedience.  So, if you want to know where to find me ~ I am that one man band bellowing out songs late into the night with screeching dogs and hostile neighbors writing for the One I love ~ all from the garage.

And so ~ we race on.

That Tempest Did Surely Blow

Yesterday I arose early and they awoke early as well, thoughts of rushing storms, rushing through and leaving crumpled bodies in the waves of destruction.  And Mamas left to drown in their pools of grief.

I have learned through trial and error there is only One safe haven when the winds whip life hallow and rains fall hard on broken days and broken hearts.  Trial and error, far more error then I care to admit and I now know my Solid Ground.

We are merely strangers and sojourners in this broken land, we are just passing through. (1 Peter 2:11)

And when tiny travelers travel home far too early for our understanding and the ground begins to shift as sifting sand beneath our feet then we must dive deep, (for deep calls unto deep in the crashing waves of tumultuous days and terrible times), we must dive deep until we crash into Solid Ground.

The Word laid open to what had been seen before but not rightly seen, but tear filled eyes have a way of espying something new, tear filled eyes see past today and peer into eternity.

And the Word of before became Solid Ground today ~

Isaiah 54:10-14
    "For the mountains shall depart
and the hills be removed,
But My kindness shall not depart from you,
Nor shall My covenant of peace be removed,
Says the Lord, Who has mercy on you.
O you afflicted one, 
Tossed with tempest, and not comforted,
Behold, I will lay your stones with colorful gems,
And lay your foundations with sapphires,
 I will make your pinnacles of rubies,
Your gates of crystal.
And all your walls as precious stones,
All your children shall be taught by the Lord,
And great shall be the peace of your children.
In righteousness you shall be established . . ."

And they there in that dark alley, that tornado alley, were certainly tossed to and fro with that tempest blow but for the righteous ~ feet find Solid Ground on foundations of sapphires!  And stones thrown here and there and rock torn asunder ~ fall as beautiful gems in the right palm of the One and those of us that pilgrim, sojourn, travel home will one day bow head and that mighty palm will place these colorful gems as garland about our crown.

Yes indeed, my feet have found that magnificent Solid Ground!

I do see in our not so distant distance three new storm tossed cities and the tempest has blown in their lives and ripped lives ragged and soon, so soon, those three young afflicted ones will come home to their temporal home that will guide them to their eternal home.

And yes, the winds begin to rise and the waves crash louder in our ears and I espy the mighty tempest blow and I surely do know as winds whip into a wild frenzy all about, I do know Who rides in this boat.  I know the One Who speaks to the storms and yes, we often do cry, "Lord, Lord, how can You take Your repose even now?!  Do you not hear the din of destruction all about?"  For His ways are not our ways and from here to the heavens His ways climb so high (Isaiah 55:9) and while we do not know why now, we will certainly know all then.

But, regardless of what may whip angry around, He is in the boat and He does speak to the storm and He is our Solid Ground forevermore.

On the grassy plains to the West where dark winds bore down and ripped tiny travelers away, you are an entirely storm tossed city today and we pray ~
            that above the crashing din and destructive darkness of this fallen world you hear the voice of the Calmer of the storm.  The Word that rises above the tumultuous terror of this fallen world, the Word that lays foundations of sapphire and builds walls of precious stone. And our Foundation is here and He will be eternally there and we pay no mind to this spinning globe for we are merely strangers in this foreign land and we race home to His heavenly throne.

We race on through dark and dangerous days and we press on ~
       for we trust in what we can not see,
  I do not rest in you or me,
       It is only He,
  so powerful and mighty,
       only to Whom we bend knee,
  And soon, so very soon, He will calm every angry sea!

words

I wonder and I do not know.  Why do I not write more?  Or why do I write at all?

What to do and what to say?  And who am I to write?  And who are you to read?  And we are nothing apart from Him.

I look for inspiration to write, I search for words.  I find none.  And yet, inspiration to laugh and love does come and inspiration to Hope, well, that is certainly here as well.  Yes, Hope certainly lives amongst us here.

And what are words beyond laughter and love?  What is ever written of value greater then Hope?

John 1:1,14 ~  And in the beginning was the Word and the Word was with God and the Word was God . . . and the Word became flesh and dwelt among us and we saw His glory.

And the words don't come, yet the Word has already come and the Word dwells among us.

And who am I that the Word would come here and dwell amongst me, and be near me and that the Word would indwell within me?

I do not know, I do not know what I am apart from the Word that dwells within me and around me.  I do not know because surely there is nothing to know, there is nothing to know apart from the knowledge of Him.

And the words do not come . . .

But, the Word did come all those years ago and the Word wrapped Himself in flesh, the same as me.

And the Word indwells in me and flows forth as living water.

The Word wrapped in flesh all those years ago and today the Word abides in me encased in my skin, my flesh.

And now do you see?  You see, the same as me?

The words do come, for certainly the Word has already come and He wrapped Himself the same as me ~

Word wrapped the same,
  Word that certainly became,
- the flesh wrapped Word - that bore all my shame,
His beautiful face, their (my) whips would mame,
  Why the Word would be wrapped the same?
These questions, my limited mind can not subdue nor tame,
  Nor can I these words of gratitude contain

So, the Word within
  Who bore all my sin,
And willingly lives within my skin,
  All praise be to Him,
He Who now abides in this ugly skin.

The words do come because the Word did come and therein lies Hope.  Hope in the Word.

Hope in a new day where deaf ears will hear this chorus of praise and no mouth goes hungry, nor hand lays empty.

Hope in the Word that sleeping spirits soon awake and soar, Hope in the Word that broken hearts will lay whole in the palm of the Word.

Hope in the Word for all we need and for all we are ~ for the Word did come and He wrapped Himself in flesh that would be ripped from the back that bore all the sin and yet, those strips of flesh would only reveal the Light.

Light that would dawn eternally bright,
  and the encroaching night
must bend trembling knee before His might.

And the Word is here and the Word is amongst us, do you hear Him?

Quiet now, and listen.  The Word is here.

Exceedingly Abundantly (Yet Not in the Ways That You May Think)

Ephesians 3:20-21 ~
   "To Him who is able to do exceedingly abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that works in us, to Him be glory . . . "

This "exceedingly abundantly above all" can not be measured in dollars, degrees, square footage or where your foot falls on the ladder rung that we run ourselves ragged to ascend.  He has already told us not to worry what we will eat or drink or what shall we wear!  Those are already provided, now maybe not in Prada but alas we shall survive without our Prada.

No, this abundance was not intended to be weighed and measured on the scales of the West, for the ways of the West weigh and measure in luxury and opulence but this is not the scales of above.  We judge and determine by the degree of ease yet, He said I judge by the cross.  And while our flesh may cry and whine our spirits do rightly know that the cross was never a way of ease (and remember what He said of your flesh?  Go ahead and let us crucify it now!)

This exceedingly abundant is measured, weighed and tried in the spirit man of you, of me and in the spirit man of all those that lay foot across our paths.  This abundance will be measured in an eternity of years spent in the splendor of His glory.

The ways of the West have crippled us, we limp and gimp through days laden heavy with burdens of things and how to pay for more of those crippling things.

And He sadly watches on and certainly He says, "You have believed a lie, this abundance was not meant to be in the form of food, or clothing, or square footage, or wealth.  It was simply an abundance of Me."

But, the flesh rules and reigns here in the West, and this cruel master has demanded more and cried it is NEVER enough and we have traded Him for a religion that feeds our flesh.

We are a people consumed with today, yet He calls to us still and asks us to be a people consumed with His forever.

And we live amongst a multitude of sleeping spirits, blinded eyes and lost souls and we worry of the state of our bank accounts and the tint in our hair and sadly souls slip away, souls separated for an eternity.

What will we say one day?  Yes, Lord, I did receive your wonderful abundance and I parked in my garage several times over and I took it out on the lake every Saturday!  And what will He say?  Oh, I do worry, He may say, "Depart from Me, I do not know you."

This is what I pray, Lord reveal this truth to us ~

While today we run on streets of asphalt, yet tomorrow we run on streets of gold.  Let us not shod our feet with slick shoes to run fast miles but let us shod our feet with the Gospel of Peace to run a multitude home into their Eternal Peace.

And so I race on, not in the moments of today but in the Spirit of Eternity.

My Dear Friends . . .

"Love is the deepest in what Love has 'loved into being.'"
                                                     ~ George Macdonald (Lilith)

The waves broke on shore that morning and our footfalls broke fresh sand and somewhere amidst the rhythmic tides I fell into His stride.  And He slowed His pace and I fell in line and we (He and me) we whispered of her and of them and I asked again, "Are You sure?"  Nine.

He asked if I remembered His friend, Mr. Macdonald, and, "Yes, surely I remember Your friend for certainly I am a fan.  Why?" I asked.

"When Mr. Macdonald laid pen to paper and spoke of Love loving into being, I thought of you.  I thought of your family, of your nine.  For rightly you know that I have loved you into being . . . "

I choke back a sob for how did I not know?  How did I not see?  Mr. Macdonald had to explain it to me?!  How did I not see?

Love has loved me into being . . . as wife and mother, as Christ follower, I am simply loved into being!

And this family? 

So deep, so very deep as the Lover has loved every fiber into being.  And the heavy burden lifts and I breathe light with lungs bursting with my Lover's air.

He reminds of another friend, a certain Mr. Robert Frost, and he too has taught me well ~

These lovely flowers I give
Prune ye My vines and fig trees,
With care My flowerets tend . . .

When the sun shines brightly
Tend flowers that God has given
And keep the pathway open
That leads you on to heaven.

But, my fine fellow, Mr. Frost, has one not told you that NINE flowerets lay in my garden?  Nine to tend with care?

Mr. Frost, what say you if this novice gardener lays wasted and exhausted and it is only high noon?  And what to do when the flowerets spring thorns by a cruel world and green thumbs lay marred and scarred by crimson red?

Oh but, Mr. Frost knew and so do I, that the Son certainly shines brightly in gardens that have been loved into being.  And novice gardeners lay wasted and bloodied hands into the hands of the Master Gardener and at high noon our Master steps about the garden and the rivers do deeply flow and I drink heavily of those living waters. 

And I wonder?  Have I ever really loved another that I have not wept over?

On the backside of deep tears lies a reservoir of Love and I lay back and am covered in the waters of Love.

And on that early morning my feet raced on, laying footprints in the sand but my spirit waded out into the deep side of this One we call Love.

Race on my friends or more rightly so, wade on, into the deep side of Love.

 

He Has Need of It

"The Lord has need of it . . . "   Mark 11:3

The words graced the envelope in her sweet script, sweet words written by a sweet woman.  At the end of that harried and haggard week I held the simple envelope in my hand and relished in the words that would lay within.  However, it was not to be for the only words she blessed me with that day lay on the outside of the envelope for its contents were only numbers (far more then I knew they could spare) on checks.  They gave their two mites and they gave Hope to three, and Peace to their Mama. 

I tacked envelope to my board and thanked God for those that care and act and I raced on.

But, He kept beckoning me back to envelope on board and finally I slowed to listen and He said ~ "Read the story, you need to understand the origin of this gift and all gifts gifted in the same."

And this was the story I read ~

 

As Jesus and his disciples approached Jerusalem, they came to the towns of Bethphage and Bethany on the Mount of Olives. Jesus sent two of them on ahead. ² “Go into that village over there,” he told them. “As soon as you enter it, you will see a young donkey tied there that no one has ever ridden. Untie it and bring it here. ³ If anyone asks, ‘What are you doing?’ just say, ‘The Lord needs it and will return it soon.’”

⁴ The two disciples left and found the colt standing in the street, tied outside the front door. ⁵ As they were untying it, some bystanders demanded, “What are you doing, untying that colt?” ⁶ They said what Jesus had told them to say, and they permitted them to take it.  ⁷ Then they brought the colt to Jesus and threw their garments over it, and he sat on it.
⁸ Many in the crowd spread their garments on the road ahead of him, and others spread leafy branches they had cut in the fields. ⁹ Jesus was in the center of the procession, and the people all around him were shouting,

“Praise God!
    Blessings on the one who comes in the name of the Lord!

And then this is what He said ~

vs 2 ~ " . . . a young donkey tied . . . "  I have gifted you and all my people with countless "young donkeys" and they appear in a variety of ways and are ALL intended for My purposes and glory.  The young donkeys that come in monetary and tangible possessions are gifted to be gifted back to Me by giving them to those in need.  My "young donkeys" are all gifts, talents, loving relationships, skills, families, healthy bodies, strong minds, the Word of God, worship and all that is good and pure in your life ~ it has all been given by the hand of God, not to be wrung out for your own purposes but to be multiplied in the hands of God to bless His people and the lost and hurting.

Editorial Note ~  We often misread our own personal "young donkeys" as gift given by Giver to increase our own enjoyment in life when they are in actuality given to glorify Giver and our enjoyment comes from bringing glory to Him, not self indulgence.

Scripture continues ~ these talents, skills, resources etc are tied just as surely as the donkey was tied that day that the Lord was in need of it.  Much of what He has given is tied hard and fast to worry, fear, greed, addiction, lust, self indulgence, apathy, and countless other posts that stand deeply entrenched in the land of our souls.  The are tied and bound and on this day the Lord says, "But, I have need of those . . ."

vs 4 ~ " . . . and they loosed it . . ."  His disciples loosed that tied and bound donkey because the Lord had need of it and certainly that is what all His disciples should be doing in all areas of our lives.  We grab the reins that are wrapped around the posts in our finances, our skills, our capabilities, our relationships, and in all that we are and we unwind gift and offer them back to Giver.  If we are His people then all reins should lay loose in the wind to wait upon the Spirit of God to blow direction upon them.

vs 5 ~ "And some . . . said to them, 'What are you doing, untying that donkey?'"  Many will question as the reins lay loose in your life, "What are you doing?"  The question may sound more like this, "Are you crazy?"  And then you will know you are getting into the good stuff.

vs 6 ~ " . . . And they allowed them . . . "  This beautiful they is never named, at least not that our eyes are permitted to see but our Heavenly Father saw and He certainly knows and they are named and known to Him.  The unknown theys are a thing of beauty and one day the unknown theys will gather and eternally celebrate with their known God.  

vs 7 ~ ". . . and threw their clothes on it, and He sat on it."  Jesus sat upon this once tied young donkey that was loosed and given because our Lord had need of it and He entered into Jerusalem on a gift that He had gifted and had now been gifted back to its rightful Owner for ~ He had need of it.  

Our chief aim as man ~ to glorify our Heavenly Father.

vs 9 ~ ". . . cried out, "Hosanna! Praise to the name of the Lord!"  And gift was loosed from the bounds of our earthly pursuits and the gift and the giver met their eternal purpose and they cried out, Hosanna! Praise to the name of the Lord, the Giver!   

I run, I teach, I sign, I cook, I clean, I give, I adopt, I write, I love, I hope, I believe, I race because ~

The Lord has need of it. 

Dawn Breaks

Matthew 28:1 ~  "After the Sabbath, at dawn on the first day of the week, Mary Magdalene and the other Mary went to look at the tomb."

The sun slides slivers of light upon the land, bursts of light and bright begin their early dawn arrival and the new day of a new week breaks first light on their forlorn faces.  These women who have watched, waited and wept; these Marys are bathed with the first wash of heavenly cleansing.  Many more waves of washes would break light on the faces of the forlorn, washing the weary and stripping the willing of all their wanton ways.

But, that first break of a new day, of that first week, these Marys met the early morning rays, Marys ~ Mary, the mother of . . . and Magdalene, the keeper of seven unclean spirits, surely kept this Magdalene was, until the kept was made clean by her King.

He had not bore our sin but had become our sin, and Father turned away from sinful Son (2 Corinthians 5:21) and broke holy communion.  He became the sin of this Magdalene, this Mary, keeper of seven sick spirits, He became that dark of that sin.  Death was required for these Marys' sinful ways, death is required too for this mother of . . . and her sinful ways.  Death was a requirement.

So, darkness fell and He died.  And then He arose.

And in this house, I am Mary mother of . . . and I am Mary Magdalene, and every morning dawn breaks again and slivers of light slide up this sinful soul and He rises again anew.  In a house full of those who certainly know the shades of dark and death has hounded hard and hopes were hopeless, in this house we know Easter, we live Easter, every moment of everyday.

He arises anew and defeats death and dashes the darkness in this house full of young souls who are aged with a lifetime full of dark and death.  Yet, He breaks a new dawn, of a new day, of a new week and dark and death quake at His early morning Light.

I am Mary mother of . . . and Mary Magdalene.  I am the empty tomb ~ this once upon a time dark death cavern that is emptied and now filled to the brim with Victory.  The stone of this stony heart has been rolled away and you are welcome to peer in and witness the cave emptied of death and dark and to meet Victory. 

By the blood of Jesus I am redeemed and restored.  By the blood of Jesus, I am Easter.  Are you?

For You

He gave . . .

He gave His life's blood selflessly . . .

So, today we gather at Calvary . . .


I barely have words to give . .

When You poured out so that I may live . . .


I am plagued by worry, by fear . . .

When all I want is to simply draw near . . .


Write on, certainly I must . . .

So in You, I place my eternal trust . . .


In the dark of the night, from the garden green, they steal You away.

They come in anger and they come ravished with lust,
   Simply because they would not trust.

The power of greed,
    They have allowed to lead,
       and they have cried, "Crucify!" Abraham's seed.

And I weep and I lament, I bend trembling knee,
    Because now I truly do see,
      I have allowed greed to lead me.

And on that dark day, my voice rang out!
    "Crucify Him!" gushed out in an angry shout!

But through that angry mob,
    His eyes caught my sob,

And He said, "Come here,
    you, my little one, simply draw near."

"My dear, come before Me and kneel,
    and I promise you, I will certainly and eternally heal."

Through the crowd I break and run,
    straight to the Heavenly Son!

With gentle eye He looks at me,
    and I scramble up upon His knee.

"Steady now," He gently speaks,
    "My time has come," and my tears begin to leak.

"My fate, I will gladly meet,
     to crush my little one's enemy under My feet!"

He sets me at the foot of His cross,
    And my Savior climbs up to endure His great loss.

In that noon time hour,
    I see His majestic power.

For the noon day sun grows dim,
    As she weeps over the impending death of Him.

The noon day sun, dark as night?
     A fairytale! Some may say, for the noon sun must give light!

A fairytale?  Certainly not!
     Such is a lie from that place of rot!

For here is the truth ~

Our Father of Everlasting Light,
   Turned His beautiful face, so bright
From Son Who willingly offered up His might
   And selflessly laid down His right
Broken and disfigured, such a ghastly sight,
   That our Father of Everlasting Light,
Turned His beautiful face so bright,
   And our land was covered in the deepest of night,
I promise, that this is certainly right.


Why He did what He did, we certainly can't see,
    But we know He has saved us for eternity!
   

We Gather in the Garden, the Garden of Gethsemane

In the garden we gather, we enter and gather around and surely we stand on holy ground . . .

The damp of the night hangs heavy in cool night air and we wander and we wonder ~
   we can not possibly be, worthy to see all that He must be?!

Yet, He invites, He asks, this God Man, He yearns for us to gather and see, gather here at Gethsemane.

So, we come in the dark of the night and our same moon spills light on this dark night and bare toes touch garden of green and we ask again ~ what has He brought us here to see?

And when they enter in, this band of haggard men, we know.  Yes, we certainly do know; there He is, there is our Jesus, He has entered in and here He stands with me at Gethsemane.  And I see the pain He wears and He wears it for me.

And He says to them, "You stay here . . . " and you three you come with Me, we must go deeper and we must go farther.  And the anguish on His face, oh His beautiful face, could quite possible break our hearts and save the entire human race.  But, He has asked us to gather at Gethsemane, He has asked us to see, all that He must be.

This Jesus, this God who wrapped the Light in skin ~ so that He could bear our sin.  This Man would cry out in agony and He would lament before the heavens and three times He would plead, "Please, take this cup from Me . . ."

And three times He would willingly surrender, "Yet, not My will . . ."

In the cool of the night as exhaustion would steal the three away, Jesus would break wide open and pour out in this garden of green.

We remember now . . .
     was it not another garden and a different man all those years ago that we know . . .
         did not that first man break wide open also?
Surely, we know our first father, he too broke in garden of green but he broke with an entirely selfish desire.  And it was his break that entirely broke us all from the hand of God.

And in a garden, he broke (we too have broken a thousand times over for purely our own selfish desire) and we have made a break that tore a chasm, a chasm of great divide that lays eternally wide.

And in the cool of the garden of Gethsemane we find yet another Man, and entirely new Man and we watch in quiet anticipation as our Jesus readies Himself to hurtle His body, heart, and soul into the abyss to bridge this chasm that broke clear and wide in that first garden, with that first man, all those years ago.

And He says, "Watch and pray!"  And they slumber and sleep.  Yet, we know we must not judge for how much do we slumber and sleep in our own Gethsemane!

In the lush garden of green we watch in terror as green is stained in droplets of His red.  We silently stare at that beautiful face as yes, we absolutely do see that agony and anguish pours forth from each pore and even now, this precious blood, His life's blood, begins its long and torturous descent from this Heavenly Body to the dry and parched land of our souls that cry out in need of a Savior.

And we see through the mist of the garden, the still of the night, we see our Savior has come and as the droplets of blood gather on such a beautiful face, we gather here to truly see why it is that we race.

We gather on holy ground before holy Savior and we ask again, "How can it be that such as You would die for me?"

But, dare we pry eyes from below?  Dare we to see?  A heaven above that weeps for her Son below!  A Son that cries out, "Father, Father!  Please take this cup from Me!"

A Son in anguish.  And Father hears the cry of His only begotten Son, Who cries out, "Abba Father, Daddy!"  And heaven weeps silent tears, for this Abba Father loved this world so much that He turned deaf ear to sobbing Son and He gave . . .

His only begotten Son . . .

And His only begotten Son gave . . .

His precious life's blood . . .

that gathered in droplets in the garden of Gethsemane . . .

And we gather around in garden so green because . . .

He gave . . .




(Matthew 26:36-46, Mark 14:32-42, Luke 22:39-46)