The Latest

We returned home Friday night, had a wonderful Saturday catching up with our 4 children here and then I woke up Sunday morning with bronchitis. I managed to get through our children's Christmas play at church and Christmas tree shopping (they had already waited over a week while we were in ET) before I crashed on the couch which is where I have been ever since. I am currently on the same couch, wrapped in a warm blanket with a host of medications around me, an ice cold cup of clean water, and a big box of puffs (the kind with lotion to pamper my nose.) BJ (Will) is back at work but he has managed to hold down the fort here; commissary during his lunch, ushering me around the hospital for lung x-rays and lab work, making dinner, and coming home early from work with a shake to soothe my throat (yes, he is in fact a saint, if he was not before, the shake put him over the top.) For the last 3 days I have rested on my comfy couch in my warm and safe home. I spent a few hours at the hospital yesterday morning and after x-rays, blood work and exam I was sent home with a whole host of medications and instructions to rest and drink plenty of fluids and all I can think about it is what happens when a child living on the streets of ET gets sick? what does a single mom do when the HIV she contracted through a rape finally begins to take its toll? What happens when an orphan is sick? When there is no mother or father to wrap him up in blankets and make sure he drinks plenty of clean, fresh water? What happens?

Before our trip to ET I could have imagined what happens but now I have seen what happens with my own eyes and that changes everything, everything. When a street child gets sick they do the only thing they can ~ they curl up in alley somewhere under the few rags that they have and they wait to die. You see them on the streets and people step over them and move on and those that step over them do not do that out of maliciousness, no, they do it out of survival. In most cases people are desperate to feed, clothe and sustain the health of themselves and their own children. They walk over or around those who have been left to die because they feel they have to. How can you give when you have nothing to give? But, that is not true of us, is it? If you are reading this blog on a laptop, I-pad, a desktop at home or at work, then you have something to give. You don't have step over the dying street child because God has blessed you beyond measure and given you an abundance in the hope that you will give that abundance away and bridge the gap.

When a single mom becomes sick in many parts of the world she does not curl up on the coach and watch Disney videos with her children. No, she goes to work because there is no sick leave, either you work and get paid or you don't and your children starve. There is no unemployment, food stamps, WIC, medicaid, medicare, government housing or anything of that nature. When you run out of money then you and your family starve to death, it is that simple. So, the single mom works until she can work no more and then she orphans her children who are often forced into the streets. Life is all about survival, the strongest survive, maybe. Life is not about career, education, a nicer house, a vacation, loosing weight and fitting into your skinny jeans, dining out, the latest Apple product or any of the other things we consume ourselves with. Life in many places is about nothing else except survival, every moment of everyday, survival, survive another day, just another day.

As I lay here I feel guilty, but I know God does not want me to feel guilty, He wants me to change the circumstances for as many people as I possibly can. We have seen with our own eyes the tremendous poverty and need but we have also witnessed the miracle that takes place when you take a child off the street and you feed her, clothe her, educate her, find her a home and tell her repeatedly that Jesus loves her. Everything changes, completely and eternally, everything changes and that is what Jesus came to do; to change it all for eternity and that is the privilege we have when we choose to stop stepping over the dying child and we become apart of God changing it all.

My guilt will not help any one but there are many things that will ...

1. I make a commitment to not complain ~ when the doctor is behind schedule; I will not complain. When the pharmacy line seems way to long; I will not complain. When I fall way behind in countless things because of sickness; I will not complain. I will not complain because I have a warm, clean, and safe place to lay my head and more importantly because I have a Heavenly Father who sees my discomfort, know my to do list and has everything under control.

2. I will not forget about the parent less children or the desperately sick single mother, I will not forget them nor cease to pray for them.

3. I will do with less so that they may have more. We don't "need" another vacation; they need food. We don't "need" more clothes; they need medication. We don't "need" another night out; they need a safe place to stay. We don't "need" a newer vehicle; they NEED to hear that Jesus loves them and we are the ones called to tell them.

4. I will go back in whatever capacity God allows me; to adopt again, to live semi-permanently or permanently.

God give us the strength to do what you have asked us to do and to never step over another one of your hurting souls.

Ethiopia Court Trip

The girls' bed, they share the top bunk. 20 or so girls all in a 12 x 12 room.

I never dreamed I would write this post after we returned from Ethiopia but then again not much about this adoption has been as I would have expected. We had 2 1/2 days notice that we needed to travel to Ethiopia so needless to say I was unable to update the blog. It all went according to His plan though and BJ (Will) and I thoroughly enjoyed every minute of it, even the painful minutes.

We left Beaufort at 2am on Friday morning and we landed in ET on Sat morning at 8 and I can not tell you how amazing it was to finally be on the same soil as our children. Landing in Africa was an amazing moment for me and I tried to take it all in knowing that soon the pace of the trip would pickup and it did. Being in such close proximity to the girls and seeing their birth country was a truly wonderful feeling.

After moving through customs, getting our visas, exchanging some money and retrieving luggage we found our driver from our agency and he quickly had us loaded into his van and on our way to the orphanage. As soon as you leave the airport the extreme poverty of ET quickly slaps you in the face and it kind of felt like I had been punched in the stomach. But I knew that we were on our way to the girls and I needed to focus on them for the moment.

Within half an hour we arrived at the orphanage which is surrounded by large walls and the gate is constantly manned by watchmen. Things were slightly chaotic at the orphanage, we could not find the nun who runs it and of course communication is limited. Many of the older children met us and took our bags from us, they were all friendly and excited to us. We carried our bags to the 4th floor and found one of the sisters who told us that the girls had just been told that we were coming and had gone to shower. So, we stood out in the walkway on the 3rd floor where the older children live and were talking to a few of the older boys when the two girls came rushing out (with very wet hair) and wrapped their arms around us. Just like that, after over a year of waiting and praying, they were there in front of us with their little arms squeezing us. It was a little bit of a whirlwind, no translators, no one to prep us for what to expect, no brief beforehand, just chaotic and wonderfully perfect. The girls were excited to see us and very friendly, obviously very nervous and very sweet. Tsinat came to me first and Eyerusalem to BJ and then we switched and I don't think from that moment on that Eyerusalem left our side. She is very affectionate and very much in need of love and stability. Tsinat is funny, playful, talkative, athletic, social and a bit of a live wire. Eyerusalem is quiet (yes, I know she is deaf but even for a deaf child she is shy,) completely lovable, adorable, very intelligent and rather tiny for her age.

We spent all day Saturday and Sunday at their orphanage with them with no contact with our agency and a bit on our own in terms of navigating Addis Ababa which was a little intimidating. But, we were able to get settled into our room at the orphanage; water was a bit tricky and hot water was very tricky! After a week there I had been able to get in 2 hot showers and about 4 freezing cold ones. Electricity was somewhat fickle and the Internet was not an option. We argued with taxi cab drivers, found a little market to get groceries, found a restaurant that served decent pizza and wandered around wide eyed at this amazing city that our girls call home. It was overwhelming at times and I am sure I would have lost it without BJ but every moment was a blessing and God was teaching us a few things about the way the rest of the world lives and He was showing me some things about myself that I am not particularly proud of (but that is another blog entirely.)

Saturday and Sunday with the girls was wonderful and they did not want to leave us at all, they were terribly sweet and very endearing. BJ and I were both in love from the first moment we saw them and the entire week solidified that God had indeed united us with 2 of our children that have lived their young lives across an ocean from us. Only He could know that they were ours and find a way to bring us to them.

Monday morning we finally reconnected with our agency people and we were off to our court date and within a few hours the judge had congratulated us and it was official!! BJ asked me beforehand why all the women were coming out of the judge's office crying? I am not sure he understood the magnitude of the moment until it was our turn, he probably was not listening when I explained that part of the process to him. Neither of us cried but it was not because the moment was not entirely amazing, it actually was surreal to be sitting before a beautiful Ethiopian judge across the world and being congratulated on the adoption of our two new daughters.

We were able to go out to a traditional dinner with some of the other adopting families from our agency, we also went shopping, went up to the top of the mountain to see Addis from a different view, tangled with a goat, braved the roads of Addis from the back of a taxi, ate injera and wat, met others from all over the world who were there to adopt, played with dozens of amazing orphans who are waiting for homes, spent time with several amazing nuns who have given their lives to these children, spent many sleepless nights praying and crying over these children and praying that the dogs would stop barking constantly, fell in love with my husband all over again (even though he smelled really bad!!!) and fell completely in love in with our two new daughters.

Now, we are home separated by an ocean again and praying, praying we are able to go back to bring them home soon. So, please pray with us, we have been told 6 to 12 weeks and we are very much wanting the 6 weeks so pray embassy goes smoothly and they are home in mid to late January. We really need every one's prayers and we are so excited for you all to meet them, I have no doubt everyone will fall in love with them too.

Fundraising opportunity

We are very excited that the ministry, 147 million orphans, that we have partnered with to bring our girls home is now allowing individuals to place orders online and we will still receive the proceeds. So, regardless of where you live you can now support our adoption and their ministry to orphans and widows and raise awareness in your area!! And it is just in time for Christmas, so please take a minute and click on the 147 MO banner to the right of this post and look at what they offer. You need to click on the banner from our blog and shop that way for us to receive credit. Thank you to everyone who has supported our adoption and cares for orphans all around the world.

P.S. Will is working on changing the banner so it fits properly on the blog, it is driving me crazy as large as it is.

P.S.S No news from Ethiopia, in His time...

Noah waited, I can wait too

Noah had been on the ark for over a year, trapped on a boat with the only other 7 human beings alive at that time and countless animals. The conditions were not the best to say the least, not exactly the cruise of a lifetime. The entire earth's population had been destroyed, Noah and his family must have undergone tremendous mourning for all that had been unwilling to head the warning of God. And here they sit, on an ark that is full of life stock and wild life. Noah had sent out ravens and a dove and on the last test the dove did not return. At this point in the story I had imagined that Noah and crew ran off the boat and prayed they would never have to step foot on an ark again, at least that is what I would have done. After over a year, seriously, the dove did not come back, we are good, lets go. But Noah was far more patient then I, he waited for another 2 months and then he heard the voice of God, "Leave the boat, all of you-" (Genesis 8:16) and they obeyed. He did not beat it out of the boat at the first sign of dry land, he waited and waited and then waited some more. He was waiting to hear the voice of God, he spent over a year on an ark and he was still patient.

We just reached the year mark on our adoption journey, I was quite hopeful that the girls would be home by now but instead we wait for our first court date. But as I read the story of Noah I thought at least I am not on ark with the only other 7 people alive! My conditions are incredibly comfortable and blessed. So, we wait to hear the voice of God - "Leave the boat Ruppels, all of you." And we wait and we pray and He is teaching me to wait and pray with patience and thanksgiving in my heart because I wait to hear His voice, what could be more incredible then that?! The voice of God finally calling me off my ark. So, I am waiting, right at the door with bags packed and ready to go but I will not settle for anything less then the voice of God. His voice calling me into this crazy love thing called adoption... His voice calling me into doing more for the orphans, widows and the lost... His voice calling me into East Africa to do whatever He asks of me.

But, in the past I have tended to jump ship to early, to say no worries God, I am good, I can swim! And He has kindly bailed me out just as I was going under, put me back on my ark and told me I had a few more survival skills to master before I walk off my ark. So, please pray for me that I will be patient like Noah and that I will wait with thanksgiving in my heart and praise on my lips. And I will pray for you ~ that when your call comes from the God of the universe, when He calls you off your ark that you are waiting at the door with your bags packed.

Please watch the above video before you read this

If you have not watched the video about Africa please take a minute and go back and watch it.

I have asked God countless times why I live with such blessing and luxury and billions, BILLIONS, live with such lack and heartache. I spent years asking, sometimes I asked Him politely, sometimes I was not so polite. I knew that the answer had to lie somewhere within us, I knew He would answer me if I continued to pester Him long enough and He did. He began to point out that more often than not our excess of luxuries was doing nothing but killing us; killing us through addictions to food, drugs, alcohol, pornography, and that list goes on and on. Killing us through our greed and materialism, killing us through mountains of debt, killing us through broken relationships that have splintered and fallen apart because of our constant need to please ourselves. He pointed out that our abundance was actually hurting us so I began another string of questions ~ why then give us so much if it is only killing us. Why allow Satan to kill them by their lack and allow him to kill us by our abundance? Billions have too much and become their own ruin and billions have too little and waste away, Why??? And then, He explained that our abundance was meant to meet their lack, it is killing us because we have greedily held it as entirely our own. We have gripped so tightly to our things that we are squeezing the life out of ourselves and those that desperately need what we have are dying every second of every day. He gave us so much, He gave to us so freely that we would give so much and give so freely. So, the answer is simple in His eyes; we must give everything we have to meet their needs, we must give everything we can to save them and in doing so we will bring salvation back into our own lives, our own families, our own churches. The gap between our two worlds is HUGE and they can not bridge that gap, they can not bridge the gap because they must strive every hour just to survive. No, the burden falls on us to bridge the gap and then we will see that it was not just "they" that needed salvation but us that so desperately needed salvation. It is so profoundly simple, it is so God. I need Africa more then it needs me ~ I hear Him say "bridge the gap" everyday. We need it with the same intensity that they need it. Satan can not kill us with our abundance and them with their lack if we give it all to level the playing field, if we bridge the gap.

Did you know that 40,000 children under the age of 5 die everyday due to malnutrition? Bridge the gap...

Did you know that almost 2 billion people, about 1/3 of the world's population have not heard the Good News of Jesus Christ? Bridge the gap...

Did you know that there are 147 million orphans worldwide? Bridge the gap...

Did you know that only $1 dollar out of every $100 dollars goes to this 2 billion? Bridge the gap...

Yesterday morning on my run I prayed for my children, all 6 of them. I ran down the list of names, praying for needs I can see and those that I cannot, understanding that He knows and understands all that my children are in need of. He is a far better parent than I could ever dream of being, so I lay them down at His feet, again.

As I prayed for my two beautiful girls that are separated from us by an ocean I prayed for the adoption process, again. Prayed for a smooth process, again. Prayed for a timely process, again. And then I began to think of all the days we have waited, we have prayed, all the days we have waited for a phone call or an email and I wondered how many more we will wait through ...

And then ... He answered me, in a quite and gentle voice ... He reminded me that He is not bound by time and space ... that He is not counting the days ... for Him the past is the present and the present is the future ... and to Him the adoption is complete ... I am already their mother ... for Him that is not confined by time as I am ... it is already finished ...

For me time is linear and space seems to be an unsurpassable obstacle and I count the days, the hours, the minutes and I am bound by time and space. But our God is not. As I counted down the last few minutes of the last few miles of the run I was painfully reminded that my body and my mind are in a constant battle with time and space, but not my spirit. My spirit has been brought to life, quickened by the Spirit of God and therefore my spirit is not bound in the same manner as my body and my mind. In my spirit, it is already finished. In my spirit we are not trapped in time and geographical spaces, we are united as one family, bound by the love of God and united by His Spirit. Regardless of the minutes, the days, the miles that we toil through, regardless that our bodies and minds are temporarily stuck in this linear treadmill of time, our spirits are not. And for whatever you wait and pray for ... know that through Him it is already done ... know that in your spirit you commune with a God that is omnipotent, omnipresent, and omniscient.

Romans 10

Romans 10:3 - "For they being ignorant of God's righteousness, and seeking to establish their own righteousness, have not submitted to the righteousness of God."

As I read this verse I knew Paul was referring to the Jews but quietly I could hear God's voice saying, "but I am referring to you, Jennie, you are ignorant of my righteousness and have tried to obtain your own counterfeit righteousness. You have substituted works and man's understanding of righteousness for My True Righteousness. You still don't get it, you still try rather then submit." I asked myself and God, "Why do I still not understand, why am I still ignorant?" His answer came quickly - "for the same reason you do not understand anyone, because you do not spend enough time with them, true time with them." My ignorance does not come b/c I need another translation of the Bible, b/c I have not gone to enough Bible studies or b/c I need to read a few more books about God but my ignorance still persists b/c I am still lacking in time with Him. I don't need to talk about Him, I need to talk to Him. I don't need to read another book about Him, I need to read the Book He wrote for me. It is really quite simple, I am ignorant of Him b/c I do not know Him as well as I should and I do not know Him as I should b/c I do not spend enough time with Him. And in my pride and ignorance I try to substitute what I can attain for Him, a sad and sorry substitute. God, forgive me of my ignorance and fill me with Your spirit of wisdom and revelation, open the eyes of my understanding. Give me the strength to be still with You all the days of my life, teach me to abide in You.

Hosea 4:6 - "My people are destroyed for lack of knowledge..."

Good News

I am very happy to write that we got word that our paperwork was submitted to the courts on September 23rd and we should be receiving our 1st court date sometime in mid to late October. Our agency expects us to travel sometime in mid November to early December for our first trip overseas. Of course, that is just their best estimate, not a guarantee. Due to many changes in the process and requirements for Ethiopian adoptions we may be delayed somewhat on our 2ND trip, they are seeing wait times of 2 to 4 months before families are able to go back and bring their children home. So, please pray with us that we will be able to fly through the process and bring our girls home quickly. When Trae heard that there was more of a delay then we expected he said with tears in his eyes, "they won't be home for Christmas, will they?" I reminded him that God is good and far bigger then anything we can perceive so we will continue to pray and believe in His perfect timing. I know I am extremely biased but I would not mind having Trae for a brother.

God has been so good to us lately (not that He is not at other times!) and He is teaching us many things while we wait for our children and He constantly presses us to seek Him and to see beyond our worldly and temporal cares. I am continually amazed by how distracted I can get with this life of mine that is nothing more then a blink of an eye. We have been challenged recently by a friend that we greatly respect to take on a new perspective of missions and in reality a new perspective of our future and all that we feel entitled too. It has already been humbling and eye-opening. I hope to write more about our experiences in regards to missions as God takes us down this path.

My prayer for us all is that we would begin to pray for His vision, not our vision. His vision will look different as it is played out in our individual lives but it will always have His love for the lost and He will always insist that we lay down all that we are to pick up and carry our cross. Jesus lived a life of sacrifice and service even though He was sinless and the most powerful being in all of eternity. Why don't we?

Mark 10:45 - "For even the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give His life a ransom for many."

No word from Ethiopia yet

I wanted to say a little more about my previous post, explain why I wrote it and why I believe it is so important. I was praying about it on my run this morning and God brought me further clarity.

Here is the thing - in long distance running and even swimming to a degree there is a "sweet spot," that place where you run or swim almost effortlessly, it is amazing and most runners thrive on running in their sweet spot. It is not understood entirely why or how this happens, in the midst of the sweltering heat, miles into what has been a painful run and all of a sudden you realize you have run right into one of these beautiful running experiences. These moments are not easy to come by, most runs are just painful but every once in awhile you get lucky.

God reminded me this morning that we all have a sweet spot spiritually too; that moment and space with God where everything else fades, the world seems far removed and you sit in a peaceful, amazing place with God where you know that you are being consumed by the Spirit of God and in that moment nothing else matters. Your spiritual "sweet spot" is effortless and painless as you sit in the presence of God. This is the place where we are made into the image of God, this is the point where healing takes place, where addictions break free, where visions are born and where everything makes sense. It is amazing, it is the place where lives are truly changed. The problem is you can not have these times with God with the TV on, your Ipod blasting, Facebook feeding a constant stream of messages from your 615 friends (how do people have so many friends?) rushing your kids around from one practice to the next or even in the midst of our constant church activities. It happens in the quiet moments with God that are full of worship, repentance and focus on our Creator. That is why I feel so strongly about quieting our lives on a daily basis so that we can hear the voice of our God. And as we learn this lesson our children will understand and they will people of God who want nothing more then to spend as much time as possible in their "sweet spot" with God. Life is short and often painful, all we really have are these moments when the Spirit of God falls upon us and we become more engrossed in the eternal, focused on all that will never pass away.

To all of us with children in our lives

We have not heard anything out of Ethiopia yet but we still have several more days so we are praying and believing in God's perfect timing, whatever the outcome may be. We are excited and confident in the future that God has in store for us.

For months I have felt God impressing a sense of urgency on me in regards to the way that I train my children, Joel 2 and Acts 2 run through my mind with regularity. He has a plan for our children, He has a purpose and it does not begin at 18 or 21 or when they graduate from college, it begins now and it begins with us... "I will pour out my Spirit upon all mankind and your sons and your daughters shall prophesy and your young men shall see visions and your old men shall dream dreams." He is clear with us, our sons and daughters should be so full of the Spirit that they see visions and prophesy and I have a funny feeling that this does not occur with the typical 1.5 hours of Sunday school that most Christian children are exposed to. No, this is a lifestyle that is lived out everyday that produces hearts, souls and spirits that are so open to the move of God that a young age they "prophesy and see visions." This lifestyle is our calling, this is our job; to raise our children in an environment that is inundated with the things of God.

In the world that we live in we have an enemy and if left exposed our children make easy prey.

1 Peter 5:8 "... for that enemy of yours, the devil, roams around like a lion seeking someone to devour."

John 10;10 "The thief only comes to steal, kill and destroy..."

There is no age requirement for this destruction, our enemy is a ruthless destroyer and he is unconcerned with age. We live in a painfully difficult world and children are faced with death and destruction everyday in a myriad of forms, they can not survive this onslaught of attacks with a mere hour or two of training a week. They need to be fully equipped, "Put on God's full armor that you may be able to STAND UP AGAINST the strategies of the devil." (Ephesians 6:11) This is a war and if you go into war untrained, unprepared and ill-equipped you don't survive, it is that simple. So, why do we keep throwing our children out into a war without teaching them the tools so that they "may stand up against" this war?

So, we know this Jennie, get to your point, here is my point: it is time we unplug and turn off all the DAILY distractions of our lives and our children's lives. God keeps pressing on my heart and my soul that they need time to learn (memorize) His word, to learn to pray and intercede, to learn to worship in spirit and in truth and to learn how to discern. It takes time to train them and they need it and deserve it. All the Ipads, Ipods, Itouches, Iphones and all the other Is of this world are not connecting us to anyone but ourselves, hence the reason they start with I. Our children spend their days in front of televisions, video games, computer screens and many other assorted varieties of distractions. Between sports, music lessons, clubs, friends, and a thousand other things we fill their lives with they are left with very little time to learn and to train to be the people God is calling them to be. Am I saying we need to get rid of our televisions, our gaming systems, our after school activities? Yes, that is what I am saying, we need to junk it all and focus on what they really need and if there is time left over then put in a few things back in. But, first and foremost we must take the time to "train them up in the way that they should go..." and that is not the church's job, that is our job and it is a time consuming job and it is a job with great value.

So, here is the next question: if we were living our lives the way that we should with our eyes fixed on Him and not on things of this world then our children would follow suit, right? So, they lived plugged into TVs, computers, Ipods, activities, etc. because we live plugged in to them, they follow what they see lived out in front of them. And make no mistake about, you are in a war and you need to train and prepare constantly and then teach your children to do the same.

In the last 2 years I have been shocked by the growth of my children in their faith as I have shut down some of the things in our lives and spent more time with them in the word, in prayer and in worship. They are little sponges and they are constantly soaking it all in, that is the way God created them. So, do we want them to soak up video games, television shows, Lady Gaga (seriously, how she can refer to herself as that is beyond me?!) or the things of our Heavenly Father.

So, lets get off Facebook, lets turn it all off, shut it down, stay home and prepare ourselves to be the people He is calling us to be. We need to stop handing our children over to satan and then acting so shocked and perplexed when they are walking away from God when we know very well that we allowed them and even encouraged them to waste away hours of their days plugged into to countless distractions.

Before you write me angry comments, remember that He is saying this to me too and it is Him who is saying it.

Fundraising Gear

This is our fundraising gear, we are trying to put together another order so if you are interested email or call me.
We have not heard anything in regards to our paperwork in Ethiopia, we still have through the end of this week though so we will keep praying. We are also waiting for word on the girls receiving our welcome package. I will post when we know more.

The latest

Here is the latest update: our paperwork is in Ethiopia still being translated and merged with the girls' file and once that is complete it will be submitted to the Ethiopian court. Here is our prayer request regarding this stage of the process - rainy season in Ethiopia begins August 6th at which time the courts will be closed for about 6 weeks so we are praying our paperwork is submitted before the closure. It will be cutting it close but if it is God's will we have no doubt it will be done so please pray with us for God's perfect timing. If our paperwork is not able to get in before the closure they expect us to travel for our 1st trip in November and then our 2nd in January. Our girls should receive their welcome bags from us sometime at the end of July so we are also praying that God will prepare their hearts to be open to us and more importantly to Him.

We moved last weekend and are in our new house and settled in and are incredibly happy here already. We moved into military housing on Parris Island and the house is beautiful and so is the base. Now I run everyone morning to the sound of Drill Instructors screaming at their recruits and gunfire, it is AWESOME!! This move has been an interesting experience for us and I have learned a great deal about trusting God through it. The whole process began last fall when we felt like God might be asking us to downsize so that we would have more freedom to help care for those who may be in need. The idea was to live below our means to better care for those who have little or no means. So, the house went on the market and I have to say that with 30 homes in our neighborhood I really did not think it would sell, I was wrong. When we got the call that it had sold I immediately began to question my sanity by leaving a wonderful house in a wonderful neighborhood during the middle of one of the busiest times in our lives! The next two days were long and I was not thrilled to say the least, Will (BJ) kept reminding me why we had chosen to try to move but it was little consolation to me as I faced the idea of uprooting our family, a tremendous amount of work, and downsizing in space while our family was upsizing in number of bodies. After 2 days of feeling sorry for myself BJ and I sat down together and prayed and let it go and immediately God began to comfort us and things seemed brighter. Within the next few days BJ was in contact with our military housing office and they offered him a home that was larger then the house we were in and on the water and $300 less then what we were paying!! Even now thinking back, I am embarrassed by my initial reaction to the news that the house had sold, how could I have doubted God? What was I thinking? I was thinking about myself and not about Him and about those who need me to quit thinking about myself and to focus on that which matters. So, our version of "downsizing" has turned into God's version of "up sizing." Not to say that every time we are willing to downsize our circumstances that God will respond with an answer that is larger, but He will see us through and bless us, EVERY TIME. At one point I was praying about the house, thanking God and apologizing for my selfishness and doubt and He told me that this house is just a small glimpse at these girls. It seems so crazy sometimes to pay an incredible amount of money to bring home 2 more children that do not even know us, it really does not make sense, just like leaving our wonderful home did not make sense. But, on the other side, past all the doubt and the fears, beyond all the work it will be so much better, He knows, He always knows.

1 John 3:16-17 - "We know what real love is because Jesus gave up his life for us. So we also ought to give up our lives for our brothers and sisters. If someone has enough money to live well and sees a brother or sister in need but shows no compassion - how can God's love be in that person?"

Wow, there it is in black and white in the Word of God. Here it is again -

Acts 4:32,34 - "Now the company of believers was of one heart and soul, and not one of them claimed that anything which he possessed was his own, but everything they had was in common and for the use of all. Nor was there a destitute or needy person among them..."

And again -

Acts 2:45 - "And they sold their possessions and distributed the price among all, according as any had need."

It is interesting to me that this is Acts, this is the brand new church who had just had personal contact with Jesus, that had hung out with Jesus and this is the outcome. They sold what they had to better care for those around them, their possessions meant nothing to them and they claimed them not. Those are the ones that sat at the feet of Jesus and they knew how He wanted them to love each other and how He wanted them to care for others, at any cost. See, I think now in 2011 we still want to care for others, sometimes, and for a cost that does not hurt us, a cost that still keeps us comfortable and happy. We always want to be comfortable which is so opposite from how Jesus lived and how the early church operated. Even though we read countless verses to tell us to love at all costs we still live on in comfort and people are dying all around us. I truly believe that if we forgot about ourselves and focused on God and what He focuses on that we would look much more like Acts and a lot less like us. God, give us Your strength and Your love to make us believers like your early church.

Update

Wow!! There have been so many things happening this month, it has been wonderful and exhausting! I am going to post a few updates as quickly as possible tonight b/c we are headed off to summer camp in the morning and I need to finish up our packing. I will write more detail after we return about some of things God has been doing in our lives these last few weeks but for now I will tell you where we are at with the girls:

Immigration approval letter came in several weeks ago and we immediately mailed it to our agency, who in turn mailed our entire dossier to Washington DC for authentication.

The dossier completed making its rounds in DC and our agency received it back and mailed it straight to Ethiopia earlier this week. Yea!!! It is so wonderful to finally have our paperwork on the girls' soil.

We received word in early June that we had received a matching grant that would match up to $5,000 in donations, we were thrilled and amazed by how good our God is. We went to TX to visit BJ(Will's) family and we were allowed to show our video about the adoption at his parent's church and that congregation donated the full $5,000. So, we left TX $10,000 dollars closer to our goal of bringing the girls home and we so encouraged by their love and support.

Returned from TX and had a package from our agency with the paperwork to officially accept the referral for our girls so that makes it official; they are truly ours. We also are now able to prepare a package for them so they will know that we are adopting them, it will include pictures of us and a new T-shirt so others at the orphanage will know they have found a family.

Four days after we returned from TX we had an adoption party at our house where family and friends here in Beaufort gathered together and we were able to share our video with them and rejoice over what God is doing in our lives and the lives of so many others. Towards the end of the night about 10 or 12 of us gathered together to pray over our girls and the countless other orphans who still await a home. It was a beautiful night for us and we felt God's presence here with us.

Tomorrow morning I leave with the younger 3 kids for summer camp in Greenville, SC and BJ and I are very excited to see what God is going to do in their lives. When we spend time praying and worshipping together as a family we can feel the roots of their relationships deepening in Christ and I know God wants to show them "deep and immeasurable things" and I am so blessed to be a part of their growth.

Also, we are moving in mid-July! Crazy but a God thing. We are staying here in BFT but we are moving into military housing to save money each month and we feel like the new home will be a better match for our expanding family. We had prayed in the fall about down-sizing and simplifying our lives and had decided to leave it up to God and then we got a phone call in late May that house had sold so here we go!

What else? Many things actually, God continues to amaze me with His faithfulness and He continues to draw us deeper into who He is and what it is He really wants us to be doing with our lives; our entire lives. I am often convicted of the fact that I have not really used what He has given me to minister in the way that He wants, but fortunately I serve a gracious God who is all about giving me another chance. I pray that I would live my life more like Jesus everyday and I know that Jesus surrounded Himself with the poor, the widowed, the orphaned and those that were truly broken; God give me Your strength to surround myself with those also.

Good News

BJ (Will) was able to work out the vehicle situation for us for when the girls come home, thereby buying us a few years before we have to purchase a new car. Which is a huge blessing. He ordered a back bench from a junk yard to put in place of our captain seats in the middle of the van and it now seats 8! A tight 8 but 8, fortunetly the kids are all thin.
Confession: Over the last few weeks I have been having moments of concern, actually moments bordering on the line of panic regarding bringing the girls home. The thought of 2 more children to care for, educate, feed etc. has been causing a little unrest in my mind lately, especially considering that these two girls will bring a whole host of special needs. I have tried not to give any credit to these fears, knowing that God will provide all; I have pushed them from my mind as quickly as possible but nevertheless they have been there on the edges of my mind. Today He brought me comfort to those fears, as He always does if we wait on Him.
Mark 12:44 "For they all threw in out of their abundance: but she, out of her deep poverty, has put in everything that she had - all she had on which to live."
Jesus was speaking about the widow that had thrown in "two copper mites" which was the sum of a half cent, she was surrounded by rich people throwing in large sums of money. As those around her gave far more money then she, she dropped in her meager offering and Jesus saw it all. vs 43 "... I tell you, this widow, poverty-stricken, has put in more than all those contributing to the treasury." Jesus saw all that she had given and He was moved by her generosity.
As I read this passage I thought, I have never given out of my deep poverty, as a matter of fact I have never even been close to living in deep poverty. I wondered and prayed if I would be able to give out of my deep poverty. But, then God reminded me that I am giving out of poverty in this adoption, I am giving out of a deep poverty of time, energy, capabilities and at times out of desire. I really have nothing to give these children, I am worn out most days and barely get by with the four children already living in my house. I know that in reality it is God who is caring for these children each day. He reminded me of the fears I have been facing lately and He also reminded me that He sees my deep poverty and He has all the bases covered, He has my back.
I continued to think and pray about this scripture in Mark and I thought it would be wonderful to hear the rest of this widow's story. In my selfish and very human reasoning I wanted a little more confirmation, I wanted to hear how Jesus hooked her up; you know; a nice home, a great retirement plan, a brand new vehicle in the driveway. Jesus had witnessed her willingness to give, surely He had removed her from her "deep poverty" and I wanted to hear all about that.

However, God showed me that I was missing the boat, seriously missing the boat. He showed me a picture of Jesus sitting across from the treasury watching humanity stream in and out; Jesus, my Jesus, your Jesus. He witnesses this poor widow and "He called His disciples to him" (vs 43) and He commends her for her sacrificial gift. It struck me that I was wondering about what blessings were brought into her life after this but she has already been given just a wonderful gift. The Son of the Living God saw her and was so moved by her that He called his disciples to Himself to teach about the true value of her gift. I don't need a commentary or even another verse in the Bible to know that she had been given far more then she could have dreamed of; she had touched the heart of Jesus. No house or retirement plan could ever hold even a fraction of the value of Jesus' love and approval. She had already proven she had a servant's heart and she wanted to show her love for her God in anyway that she could.
Jesus, left the temple after speaking of the widow, He would be crucified shortly there after. His last lesson in the temple was taught with this widow's humilty as its focal point. She gave everything she had and was given everything she could ever be in need of. John 4: 10 " and He would have given you living water."
I pray God always sets me straight when I miss the boat and that I may learn how to give out of my "deep poverty" also.

Question for the ages

Mark 8: 27 -29 "...He asked His disciples, who do people say that I am? and they answered Him, John the Baptist; and others say Elijah; but others, one of the prophets. And He asked them, But who do you yourselves say that I am?..."
Jesus was building to something here, He already knew what people were saying about Him, He is the Son of the living God, He knew full well what was being said about Him. He was leading His disciples to the real question; and "who do YOU say that I am?" That is the same question He is asking you and I, who do you say I am? When it is all said and done and we stand before our God He will only be concerned with one person at that moment. What our parents, our friends, the religious leaders of the day, the politicians, our spouses etc said about Jesus Christ will not be included in that discussion. Whether we have been misled by someone we trusted will not excuse us on that day. Jesus is asking us, me and you, Who do you say I am? Who do you say I am in your life? Unfortunetly, this will not be a multiple choice test, there will be no makeup exams; there is the right answer and then all the other answers. Peter got it right, "... You are the Christ.." Don't even waste your time with what anyone else says, the only answer that will matter to your Lord and Savior is what you say He is. The question for the ages; the one question that every human being that has ever walked this earth must answer; who do you say Jesus is?

To anyone who read yesterdays' blog in its entirety; you are a brave soul and I am sorry for its length. Will (BJ) read it and described it as "wicked long," not exactly the adjective I was aspiring to so I will try to refrain from anymore novels.

Mailed our dossier last week!

This was the blog that I started last week and then put it aside to write another one so I figured it was time I finished this one. I did get our dossier mailed off last week and our agency is reviewing it and we are still waiting on our immigration paperwork. We are praying it comes in next week.
5/3
I mailed our dossier paperwork this morning to our agency and I am very excited to have that portion done! Will and the guys prayed over the paperwork last night at our prayer meeting and then we prayed together last night and I know God is going before it to prepare the way. We are still waiting on our immigration letter of approval so please pray with us for a very quick turn around. We were fingerprinted last week in Charleston so that was the last step that immigration needed from us so I know it will be here soon. Then the dossier heads off to the powers that be so they can do whatever they need to do to bring the girls home.

Another update: we signed a 3 year lease with a Navy family that will be moving into the home that we own in Charleston. It is such a huge blessing to have that resolved and in the process we witnessed God's provision and attention to detail, it is amazing the way He orchestrates our lives. The family found our house on Craig's List and after a few emails she realized that our families had served together on the USS HM Jackson when we were stationed in WA. She recognized our last name b/c I had been her phone tree caller during deployments. Only God can connect people in His perfect timing. Who knew? God uses Craig's List!

On Sunday (two Sundays ago now) our pastor read James 4:8 - "Come to me and I will come to you..." which is a verse I have loved for sometime. However, in the last few days I have gone back and studied the verses preceding and following verse 8 and there is a wealth of knowledge and understanding that I know God wants to instill in our hearts and minds.
James 4: 7 -10 "Submit yourselves to God. Resist the devil and he will flee from you. Draw near to God and He will draw near to you. Cleanse your hands, you sinners; and purify your hearts, you doubled minded. Be afflicted, and mourn, and weep: let your laughter be turned to mourning, and your joy to heaviness. Humble yourselves in the sight of the Lord, and He shall lift you up."
The verses that surround this beautiful verse, "draw near to God and He will draw near to you" are full of very clear guidelines and instructions for us on our journey to "come to God." James draws our attention to 5 different things that will bring us closer to our Savior. Please do not mistake me, I am not speaking about works that help us earn our place in a closer relationship with God but I am speaking about 5 choices, 5 attitudes that can either strengthen the bond or drive a wedge between us and God. God has promised us an intimate relationship with Him solely based on Jesus' death on the cross but as in all relationships, it is a two way street. We are the only thing that stands in our way when it comes to Jesus Christ, He already made His choice, there is no question about it, He is all in with you and with me. The question is are we all in with Him? Back to the 5 choices, James tells us we must make as we make this trek towards God.

First: "submit yourselves to God" or be subject to God. The first thing James tells us is to be subject to God, to be under the authority of God. I love these types of descriptions b/c after being raised by a Navy man and now being married to a Navy man, authority and being subject to someone else are things I understand. We live our lives under the authority of the Navy; regardless of what is going on in this house when the Navy says it is time to go, he goes and the children and I understand and respect that. To be subject to God is easy to understand, but not even the slightest bit easy to put into practice sometimes. My desires, my feelings, my thoughts, my plans come in 2nd place to His plans, regardless of whether or not I happen to like His plans. In every area of our lives we are to be subject to God; we line our thoughts, our time, our resources, our relationships, our ministries, our careers with God, and as we do this we are taking huge leaps and bounds towards Him and He will never disappoint us, He is leaping and bounding towards us.
Second: "resist the devil." This is not something that can be accomplished passively, the word resistance implies action. Resist - to withstand; fend off. to oppose ACTIVELY; fight against. Satan will not flee you if you are not actively engaged in spiritual warfare were you battle him with the spiritual armor you have been given (Ephesians 6:13-18.) Come on you all, this is war and we are on the winning side but we need to pick up our weapons and fight this fight in our own lives and then take this fight to the streets to help those who have not learned how to fight yet. But make no mistake, you must resist him in your own life first and then you can spread God's freedom to the world around you.
Third: "cleanse your hands and purify your hearts" Man, I seem to have to do this everyday, sometimes every hour! It is amazing the filth my hands can get into and how quickly my heart divides itself between the world and God. Everyday, all day, cleanse and purify through the blood of Jesus Christ. Our loyalty is wavering and weak, we need God to purify and strengthen us. The spirit is willing but the flesh is so weak which means if you spend to much time, or anytime for that matter listening to your flesh then you have some cleansing and purifying to do. It is all through the blood of Jesus and it is quite simple, the only thing that stops us is our unwillingness to choose God over and over again. It is our choice, we must ask for this cleansing and then we will have to ask again tomorrow and then the day after and so on until we go home and live in perfection with our Maker.
Fourth: "be afflicted, mourn, and weep" Why? because we grieve the heart of God with our sin. I grieve the heart of God with the garbage I allow in my life. Have you ever really wounded someone who loved you dearly, who was completely devoted to you? I have, I have hurt people I love and people who love me. I have seen the pain in their eyes that I have caused, I can still see the pain in their eyes. It is so much worse with God because He was/is blameless and He is the best friend I have ever had. And I have trampled on that devotion, love and holiness more times then I would care to admit. We need to take the time to face Him, to look into His eyes and see the pain we have caused and weep over our selfishness and insolence. We have wounded the heart of the Creator of the universe and nothing is more deserving of mourning then that. We should not take our sins lightly, we need to stop and allow ourselves to feel just an ounce of the pain He feels and then we would walk away from sin, actually if we really understood what we have done then we would sprint away from sin.
Fifth: "humble yourselves in the sight of the Lord" First of all, you need to be "in the sight of the Lord" and I have a feeling that "in the sight of the Lord" does not include a 3 minute prayer on your way out the door in the morning, or the 4 1/2 verses we read right before we fell asleep last night. "In the sight of the Lord" conjures up images of time spent alone, devoted to God. It takes a little awhile to shrug off the cares of our lives and to cleanse and purify ourselves and to really focus our eyes on our God. And honestly once we have done that the humbling part comes relatively easy because our God is so good and so everything that we are not, that we immediately recognize our need to be flat on our face before God (spiritually and literally.)

All 5 require active participation on our part, it is not unlike any other relationship, it requires us to be present, to put in time and effort. The wonderful part of this story is that we are promised, we are guaranteed that in this relationship we will never be let down. We will never come near to Him to find out that He is emotionally unavailable or that He is preoccupied with His new BFF (best friends forever - that's for you mom b/c I know you had no idea what a BFF was) or that He is having a bad day too and He just can't deal with your baggage right now. No, this time we can take it to the bank that He will draw near to us EVERY TIME! So, why do we put so much time into every other relationship except this one, I think it is b/c we don't really get it, we don't really understand who He is. But, I have a sneaking suspicion that we are starting to get it, I can feel it in my soul, my spirit, we are drawing nearer to Him like we have never drawn near before and He is so excited (can't you feel His excitement?) He is amazingly patient, He is waiting.

Something God wants us to hear

I have an unfinished post that has several updates but I decided to put that one on hold to share with you something that I know God wants us to understand. I will post the updates in a few days.
Will (BJ) and I are on the last day of a fast and there are 3 things we have been focused on during this fast; the adoption, our friend who has come under considerable attack from the enemy and on a personal note we have been praying for an improvement in our diets (aka sugar!) This morning I was praying during my run (it is always a God thing when I complete a run during a fast b/c they are slow, painful and at times treacherous!) and I was asking God to empower us to break this fast tomorrow in a Godly manner and to strength us both to overcome our love affair with sugar. This seems like a relatively simple matter and as I prayed I was not expecting God to knock me over with the depth and knowledge that He hit me with this morning, but thank God He always exceeds my expectations. God brought me this:
Isaiah 61:3
"...to give them beauty for ashes
...joy for mourning
...praise for their burden..."
Jennie, give me your ashes and I will bring you My beauty. It took me a second, I am often slow with God, but He was kind enough to explain. What has my addiction to sugar brought me? Nothing but ashes, ashes of my body as I have willingly taken in substances that bring harm to this temple He has blessed me with. Nothing but ashes, ashes of body and mind as I have substituted a substance for God's best in my life. Let's be honest ALL of our ungodly addictions bring us nothing but ashes, as we cater to our addictions of food, nicotine, alcohol, drugs, pornography, materialism, and the list goes on and on, we are piling ashes into our bodies, minds, souls and spirits and those ashes bring us mourning and heavy burdens. Look at your life, are you stockpiling ashes? Ashes as we burn up our bodies as we pollute them with things God never intended for us to consume, ashes of our burned up talents and skills that are being wasted b/c we are to burdened and broken by our addictions, ashes of our relationships that have been damaged and splintered by the toxic things we choice to bring into our lives, ashes from the ministries we never poured ourselves into, ashes from the squandered financial resources that He has given us that we wasted on our own lustful desires, are they there? Can you feel them? Are they a heavy burden that saddens and weakens you? They do me. God is saying to us all " your ashes for my BEAUTY!" Beauty as I bring healing to your body, a wholeness to your mind, restoration to your relationships, blessings to your finances! All we have to do is lay the ashes caused by our addictions down at His feet and walk away from them.

Beauty for ashes...Joy for mourning...praise for our burdens... I am in! That is a deal I want to make and I know God wants you to make the same trade. We all are struggling with something or somethings and I promise you these things of the world are bringing us nothing but ashes. Every moment, every second that you are hit with that temptation cry out to God and remind Him of His promises to us, beauty for ashes, God, we want your beauty for our ashes.

What has this world brought us? Ashes that has soiled and dirtied our bodies, minds, and souls, but not anymore. When we lay it down it is replaced by His beauty. May God strengthen us as we exchange our ashes for His beauty, our mourning for His joy and our burdens for His praise.

Happy Easter

FISH FRY!!!

My sister held a fish fry for us yesterday and it was wonderful, we thoroughly enjoyed the entire day. Ali planned the whole thing, all we did was show up and hang out. My family has always been very supportive of me and my crazy ideas but they have all outdone themselves with this adoption. Sometimes this task God has placed before us seems impossible and in reality it is, to change the lives of orphans is impossible. I do not have the capabilities necessary to minister to orphans, it is impossible to make this all work. We already have 4 children (people like to remind me of this, as if I could ever forget about the 4 little bodies already living in my home), Will is in the Navy and deploys, I home school, our girls are special needs and the list goes on and on. None if it makes sense from my stand point, none of it. But, then He reminds me, "all things are possible with God" (Matt. 19:26); "all things are possible to him who believes," (Mark 9:23). But, in all honesty sometimes I wonder what does that really look like? All things are possible with God but I am the one here who lives in this house who has to care for these children, I am the one who has to teach a deaf child to read, I am the one who writes the checks, I am the one with all these things pressing in around me. Am I alone in this? Has anyone else ever asked these questions? What does it look like, this "anything is possible" thing? Well, this fish fry is what it looks like; when God lays it upon someone's heart to give of themselves to the benefit of another. When someone takes your hand and says I will walk this road with you because I love you and because God loves you. When you reach out to someone that God has laid on your heart, you are touching them with the love of God and you are confirming in their heart, their soul, their spirit that they are in fact loved by the creator of the universe and He has not forgotten about them. No, God will not come down and prepare the spaghetti for dinner tonight, or teach our math lesson today or many of the other things on my ever growing to do list. Chances are that He is not going to be checking off things on your to do list either, but He will send others (like my wonderful sister) who will stand with you and as they stand with you, know that He stands with you also. Sometimes I look back over a day, a year, my life and I can feel and see that He has carried me, always. Sometimes, it is in a very tangible way (such as yesterday) but many times it is just a gentle strength that lifts me up on high and I realize I am soaring on wings like eagles. Not to say that there is not pain, frustration, exhaustion, confusion or fear because we are in fact human and we do feel the pain of fallen mankind but if we lift up our eyes and allow Him, He will carry us through this life. In actuality that is what He longs to do more then anything; to carry us, to tuck us safely under His arms and keep us in His embrace, His love surpasses anything that we could ever fathom. He keeps no record of wrongs, He sees us for everything He created us to be not for all the things we have done, we are His children and He wants to treat us as such. The only thing we have to do is surrender, to let go of all the things of this world that we hang onto and fall back into the arms of our Abba Father. Just let go, let it all go; the things of this world have nothing of eternal value and the view is so much better from up on high. May we all learn how to surrender completely and to soar high on wings like eagles.

Thank you Ali for reminding me that He is always watching, always caring and providing, He stands guard to my front and to my back and to either side and that all things are possible to him who believe. And I believe, I believe God will do all that He has promised and that He is faithful and able to complete that which He has begun.

Updates and general business

Wow, we have had a busy week and it is only Thursday! A good busy though, a busy full of little people who need and deserve love and as usual, a ton of our adoption paperwork. The update is this: we received our date for fingerprinting from immigration, it is not until the end of April though. I was a little disappointed with the date b/c I was hoping for you know, yesterday for the fingerprinting but alas it is all in God's hands anyway. Will (BJ) called immigration early this week and they informed him not to expect to have an approval letter until mid-June. Once again, slightly disappointing b/c we all know what I was hoping for, yesterday. But, again it is all in God's hands, that is my mantra these days, over and over again, it is all in His hands. We are praying and believing that our paperwork will be assigned to the most efficient immigration case worker known to man and we will see our approval letter much sooner than mid June. So, please pray for this nameless, wonder of all wonders, our case worker who is going to turn out our approval letter like it is their job, because it is in fact their job and they are going to do it beautifully! Thanks for praying with us for this wonderful case worker. I am still cranking out paperwork all the time, right now as we wait for the immigration letter I am focused on grants. So, that is that with our new girls. The other excitement this week has to do with some adorable little people who we were blessed to spend time with. I blogged about them earlier this week, their family was in a tight spot and a woman from our church who is nothing short of a saint took this family of 5 into her home. We have cared for the two older boys off and on this week to give some relief to our friend. Last night I brought the two boys (2 and 1 years old) home with me from church and they spent the night here. After baths, medicine, bottles and the whole family praying for them and over them (during which the 1 year old kept trying to hit his brother and Gracie) they were off to bed. They slept beautifully, not a sound all night; however I woke up off and on and found myself praying for them. Early this morning I packed them up and went to pick up their mom and baby brother and then I dropped them all off with a wonderful ministry that provides families with a place to stay to help get back on their feet. Their mom will be provided with job training, preparation for her GED, WIC, etc and the boys will have a safe, clean environment to be in. It is run by a network of churches who open their churches up to allow the families to stay there with a host family in the evenings. Then they spend their days with the Family Promise ministry working on life skills. Wow!! It is an amazing ministry and I think we all need to prayerfully consider supporting these types of things with our time, energy, money and prayers. They are about the "business of their father" that is for sure. "That which you do unto the least of these you have done unto me." He is so clear about our obligation to care for the least of these around us, He provides no disclaimer or guidelines, He never says, "help them if they are clean and sober" or "if they have submitted a certain number of job applications" or "help them if they are deserving," He just says help them. No qualifications, no exceptions to the rule, just care for them. It is us who decide someone is not worthy of our help; by which we imply that we are worthy of the grace and mercy He showed us which we know is not true. So, why do we freely take God's gifts for us when we were not even slightly worthy of them but then withhold them from others b/c they are addicts, convicts, etc and therefore should be cast aside, left under a bridge or living in their car. Jesus never would have turned them away, NEVER. The Bible does not speak of drug addicts, convicts, dead beat dads, life long welfare recipients because that was not the terminology of their day; they used terms such as tax collector, sinners, women of questionable virtue and so on. But, the message is still the same, love them all; those of questionable values, those that our society considers unworthy of love, those that repeatedly choose a drug over their children, and the list goes on and on. Jesus' message is still the same, care for them as you would care for yourself. In fact, Jesus was so clear with this message that He revealed himself to be the Messiah to the woman at the well, do you know who the woman at the well was? A Samaritan and a woman who had been married 5 times and was living with a man who was not her husband at the time of her meeting with Jesus Christ. He did not turn his back on her, walk away, refuse to converse with her, instead He told her that He was in fact the Christ and offered her living water (John chapter 4.) He showed her unconditional love, her sins were not hidden from the world like we so often try to hide ours, no, all of society knew all about her. She was the one that all the other women gossipped about at church potlucks, at Bible studies, in the lunchroom. She is the one that we all want to believe that we are nothing like but in fact we are one in the same, sinners in the need of a Savior. And Jesus was just that for her, a Savior. While we were busy turning our back on her b/c she was of an unsavory character He was busy building a relationship with her. If we are being honest with ourselves then we must admit that we were all the "woman at the well" at one time in our lives and He came to us and ignored our ugly, overwhelming sins and extended all that He is to us. So now, we are cleaned up and playing the part of a good Christian and maybe, just maybe forget that we were that woman at the well and we turn our back on her. They do not look like us, act like us, talk like us, think like us, they often make horrible decisions that bring pain into others' lives; often times nothing about them seems right, the way they smell, the way they move, the way they speak or don't speak and that is exactly who Jesus was talking about. You all know what I mean, they make us uncomfortable, they make us hold onto our children and our wallets a little tighter but instead of turning away for them it is time to turn towards them. Take them out to lunch, speak to them, pray with them and you will find that they are the woman at the well, that they are in fact me, you, all of us before Christ came to us and extended us a cup of living water.

Blessings

We are still waiting and praying and realizing more and more each day how good God is to us. We have not heard anything more from immigration so we continue to pray for a quick return, we have completed the majority of our portion of the dossier so when immigration is complete we should be ready to mail everything to our agency pretty. I am also working on a few grants that will hopefully assist us in aquiring all the funds we need to complete the adoption. The grants are very similar to the adoption process, a ton of paperwork! I wish God had gifted me with an abundance of administration skills but He has choosen to stretch me instead. BJ and I have felt from the start that God would provide every dollar that we need to bring the girls home and yesterday and today He proved us right. At church yesterday our pastor asked us after service if we had heard about the check they received on behalf of our adoption. As it turns out a friend of BJ's from TX (God bless TX) had made a considerable donation. It is hard to explain how wonderful it feels when others partner with us to see the fulfillment of our vision come to fruition. It builds confidence in me as we continue to step out in faith to see how God is speaking to others about our girls. Today there was a knock at our backdoor and our little neighbor who plays all the time with Gracie was standing there with a check for me, she says, "here is fresh cilantro and a check and can I play with Gracie?" So sweet I almost cried (if I did that sort of thing.) Any rate, all of that to say, that God is good and I am truly blessed by those that have been so generous to us. Thank you, from the bottom of our hearts. Right now we have two little extra bodies around our house... Ok, those two little extra bodies ended up waking up so I was not able to finish that post. I do want to tell you all about them though, they are truly precious little boys and they need our prayers. Their parents are in a very difficult place in their lives right now and one of the families from our church opened their home up to them. There are a total of 3 boys; aging 2,1, and 4 months. We had the older two boys yesterday and they will be here again today to try and help provide some relief for our friend from church who has quite a full household right now. The children are adorable and I enjoyed having them here to spend time with me and to pray for them and over them. It is hard to watch innocent children, so full of potential and very much deserving of a bright future fall victim to the mistakes of their parents. Every choice we make, whether a Godly choice or not impacts those that share our lives with us and that is never more apparent then in our children. We so often want to believe that we live in a vacuum; that if we choose to damage ourselves then it is only us that suffer, when we all know in our hearts that that is a lie. John 8:32 "You will know the truth and the truth will make (set) you free." The truth is that we are interconnected with our God and with each other and every word, every choice, every thought directly impacts those that we love. If we absorb this truth into every fiber of our being it will set us free in our families; we live in complete freedom to speak words of life into each other and to make choices that bring life into our homes. We can impact people with God's love and forever help shape the course of their futures, we can sow seeds that will bring forth much fruit in their lives. Nothing about this is easy, especially as a parent or as a spouse, these people that are so tightly woven into our daily lives can at times be trying and stretch our faith and our patience way past a comfortable level. Which is exactly why God built these relationships into the very heart of each of our lives because He knew it would drive us to our knees in prayer and into His arms as He asks us to push way past our capabilities. Every minute of everyday needs to be spent in communion with Him, "... be unceasing in prayer." How else can I make choices hour after hour, day after day that bring love and life into my family without being in constant contact with the Giver of life and love? I can't, it is impossible, I have tried and I have failed over and over and have brought pain into my home. I don't want to go back, ever. God; teach me to love with your love, speak your words and to be so much more of You and nothing of me. Please pray with us for this family, for wisdom, for freedom, for breakthrough and for healing. God's hand is upon this family and he loves these little boys with complete and utter devotion, pray for us that we can love them as He does.

I am suppose to be on a run right now, but I am using a sore throat as an excuse to sit here and blog instead. I am not sure my waistline agrees with my decision but that is the way it goes sometimes. I received an email this morning notifying me that my immigration paperwork has been received and sent to the appropriate office. In three different places on the email it said "DO NOT REPLY TO EMAIL" which is probably a good thing b/c my first thought was I need to email them and see where they are in the process; are you done? how about now? done yet? wait two minutes and then ask again. I learned that tactic from my children, they are professionals at wearing me down. So, that is the latest; it is there at the correct office and now we wait. Matthew 23: 3 (Jesus speaking about the Pharisees) "So observe and practice all they tell you; but do not do what they do, for they preach, but do not practice." I read this and immediately thought of my children, how often is this true in my life in regards to them? How often do I preach to them but not practice? No one spends more time with me then they do, they know me at my worst. I pray God teaches me to practice and not preach, I pray He gives me the strength to be the person I expect them to be. We so often cut ourselves slack; always have a reason for the things we do or don't do but then do not extend that benefit of the doubt to others. Matthew 23: 10 "And you must not be called masters, for you have one Master, the Christ." We are not to be a master in some one's life and we are not to have any masters before Christ, seems simple enough but when you really stop and focus on what He is telling us it becomes more difficult. A person becomes our master when we stand silent b/c we fear what they may think more then we fear what God thinks of us. Our boss or our career becomes our master when we place more of a priority on company policy then the Truth. Our friends are our master when we don't say the things we know we should say just to avoid their disapproving looks or hurtful comments. Our children act as masters as we jump through hoops to avoid disappointing them or depriving them of so many things that they never needed to begin with. The list goes on and on and I realize that I have many masters in my life sometimes as I worry and fret about what others are saying or thinking about me. But, the sad truth in my life is that the master I so often serve is not God or even others but MYSELF. I am slave to what I want, what I think, what I feel. Am I having a bad day? am I tired or a little strung out? Well then God you are going to have to wait until I get some downtime and meet all my needs. Jesus Christ as my Master means what I want in all areas of my life regardless of how insignificant they may seem have to be under total surrender to Him. Whether I wanted to head in another direction no longer matters. The funny thing is is that when I live my days in this type of surrender; when I say the things I know I should say and hold my tongue when I know I should hold my tongue, when I try to love others with His love, life is so much more wonderful, so much more peaceful, so much more complete. When I surrender to the true Master I find true freedom. God, teach me to live the rest of my days serving only You as my Master. On a completely different note; my younger three kids and I have been trying to grow Triops (a prehistoric little creature) for a Science experiment. And I have just killed my second batch, who knew that growing Triops was so difficult!? Apparently I am Triop KILLER and did not know it! Sad. Cole said to me yesterday that I needed to stop ordering more Triops b/c I am just wasting my money. Wow, from the mouth of babes. The truth hurts sometimes. I saved half the batch from the last order so I am going to go for round 3 with these little buggers, wish me luck!

Our girls

Our girls are between the ages of 10 to 12yrs old. The oldest is deaf and mute since birth. Will and I were so excited when we got their file, what a blessing! We were so sure that Gracie would be our last child, only God knows what wonderful blessings He has in store for us. Not quite sure what a house with three teenage daughters will be like, I am sure it will be quite the adventure. Fortunately they have two brothers (for now, you never know!) to keep an eye on them.

I mentioned in another post that we were hosting a "Pig Pickin and Oyster Roast" and I wanted to fill you all in on how that went. Even though BJ (Will) and I had no idea what we were doing it turned out to be a huge success and all the credit goes to Mike (Uncle Mike to us,) my sister and her fiance Robert, my Dad and Deb. We raised $2,000 and everyone really enjoyed the evening. Thank you to everyone who helped, thank you Mike and Deb from dreaming that up and thank you to my family for driving up at the crack of dawn to make it all possible. We are truly blessed to receive so much love and support. For those of you who are into the Pig Pickin sort of thing; my sister is planning a fish fry for us on April 23rd in Charleston. So, all of our friends back home please help us get the word and come by so we can catch up (not to name any names; Jenny, Mindy and Jill.) I am currently in the middle of another big fundraising idea, I am waiting and praying, trying to make sure this was the Big Man's idea and not my own. My ideas never fare as well as His, crazy that way. So, please pray that He gives us wisdom and direction and that immigration is crazy fast!

Thank you for your comments, I loved hearing from you guys.

I am back!!

I know everyone (all 3 of you who follow my blog) have been on the edge of your seats waiting for this next blog, so I will not keep you waiting any longer, here it is. Sorry to have been silent lately, we have been dealing with a few things and God has been dealing with me on a few things. I have not written b/c I was not sure what to write but this week the fog seems to be lifting and I have a few things to share. We have had some great news on the adoption front and other news that was a little less then great. I will start with the unfortunate and get that out of the way; Ethiopia announced about a month ago that they would be reducing the number of international adoptions by up to 90%. That came as a huge shock to those of us pursuing Ethiopian adoptions; however, I have to say that God supplied the necessary grace b/c I was not in turmoil when I heard the news. BJ (Will) and I both felt at peace with where we stood in the process and that God was not shocked or worried by what the Ethiopian government was doing. I hunkered down quite a bit, stayed quiet and felt very called to fast and pray for these children who would be effected by this decision. It is heartbreaking to us as families who are waiting but we are just that "families," living in our nice homes, surrounded by people who love us. It is the true orphan, sitting in orphanages who will truly take the brunt of this decision. God gently reminded me that is not about me and any disappoint or worry that I may be feeling but it is about these children. So, we waited, prayed, fasted and tried to chill and then we got a wonderful phone call from our agency. They wanted us to continue on with our process as if this would not effect us, they are believing that Ethiopia will still place a priority on children like our girls who are special needs and difficult to place. The phone call came through to my spirit as clearly as if the words had come directly from God. So, that is exactly what we are doing, we are plugging away at our dossier as if nothing has changed, believing that nothing has for us. Our home study was completed and approved by our agency we got the paperwork for our dossier (the day before my birthday, great bday present!) And we have been working steadily since we got it last Monday and things are moving along very well. I mailed paperwork to immigration yesterday which will probably prove to be our most lengthy part of this stage so we are praying for a quick turn around there. Please pray with us regarding our immigration paperwork, we always pray God's hand would be upon the paperwork and the process and that we would find favor with all that help us in these agencies. We have to get more documents in order and notarized, one of them has to have the seal of the secretary of the state so we are churning out paperwork like it is our job. So, that is where we are at; waiting, praying, and believing that all is well. This is one verse I live by: Psalm 37: 4,5,7 "Delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the Lord; trust also in Him and He will bring it to pass... Be still and rest in the Lord; wait for Him and patiently lean yourself upon Him; fret not yourself..." The next post will have some cool info in it so standby and please comment on what you think and feel about all of this. I would love to hear what you the three of you think!

Update on DSS paperwork

I posted last Thursday that we were waiting on our clearances to return from DSS and right after I posted that blog I received an email from our home study agency letting me know that the clearances has just been returned. Yea! So, now our home study agency will send the entire home study packet to our international agency for their approval and then back to DSS for their approval and then to immigration for their approval. Are we noticing a trend here?! Paperwork and approval, paperwork and approval; reminds me of the military. Oh and hurry up and wait, that is the Navy's most preferred game. So, we are well equipped for this process thanks to our training from the Navy. Hopefully we will have everything off to immigration in a month, hopefully.
On the fundraising home front we have a garage sale on Saturday and then the Oyster Roast on following Saturday the 26th. Can I tell you that I know nothing of Oyster Roasts! Nothing, absolutely nothing. We Californians are not experts in the roasted oyster or pig pickins. I had to write up a flyer and type the word pickin, we all realize that pickin is not a word, right? It is picking, but Will told me I must use proper southern terminology if I am to advertise amongst them! So, to my dismay I had to type pickin and ignore the spell check that was screaming at me! So, pray for us as our horizons are broadened and we experience new things in pursuit of this adoption.
John 15:2
"Every branch in me that beareth not fruit he taketh away: and every branch that beareth fruit, he purgeth it that it may bring forth more fruit."
the amplified translation says it this way -
"... and He cleanses and repeatedly prunes every branch that continues to bear fruit.."
It is easy to blaze through this scripture but if you slow down and take a close look at these words you quickly realize that this process of bearing more fruit will most likely be uncomfortable at the least and very likely more like painful. If you have ever undergone a cleanse whether that be from sugar, cigarettes, television, a toxic relationship or whatever needs to be removed from your life then you know that it is difficult, trying and often it is simply painful. The word prune means "to cut out unnecessary parts," lets just be straight here for a minute, cutting is not a warm fuzzy kind of a word. It implies a swift, decisive, intentional and painful act to remove that which is unnecessary. It can not be an easy process, God did not say it would be, He used specific language to ensure that we knew it would be difficult. But, then He makes us a promise if we will endure this "pruning, cleansing, and purging," He will bring about more fruit in our lives. And, what is fruit? Fruit is life; God's life being poured out into us because we have been cleansed and therefore we have room in our lives to allow this new fruit. If we allow God to cut that which is sinful or just unnecessary then we will give room to that which is life giving and eternal rather then temporal. So, if God is pruning, which we should all pray that He is in our lives, then relax in the discomfort and pain because you have a promise that He will bring more fruit which is far greater then anything we could ever hope for. So now we all say in one accord PRUNE AWAY! or at least we pray for the strength to say prune away. Happy pruning everyone.